Bix Nood Posted:

You gotta be a careful fine upstanding member of society here: The undead brothas are out to eat your meat (no homo) and you gotta shoot them like they were the po po on crack.

Move into the next room, carefully, and shoot whatever the hell comes at you.

fine upstanding member of society grabs the ammo, then advances into the nearby room, pistol drawn. Hearing noises but seeing nothing, he advances into the next room. He spots a small health globe, but decides to leave it for later. He suspects he’ll need it. And sure enough…

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Ow. Shotguns ****ing HURT.

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****.

Hmmm, this place means business, guess the ol’ war stories were true…time to disprove that whole ‘nobody returning alive’ bull**** though. fine upstanding member of society preses on, grabbing a medpack on the way (on easy mode you get a fair few of these and they heal like 56% health Log in to see images! He notices a barrel sitting next to the kit, and decides to take a look. Flammable. Highly explosive. Hmmmm. He walks through a door to the north, pondering this turn of ev-OH **** WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING ARGH IT’S TRYING TO CLAW ME APART **** D:

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MOCK-CONGLERS **** Posted:

lure em close to the flammable barrel then shoot the barrel Log in to see images!

-dont get blown up tho

A step to the southwest before firing at the barrel in the room that’s still visible should help with that.

Serch the entire map, pull any levers you find.

XSS Code Posted:

Serch the entire map, pull any levers you find.

fine upstanding member of society decides he should look around. Heading back, he runs into another former sergeant. This one seems to decide that fists make an effective substitute for a shottie at close range. fine upstanding member of society proves it and the intestines he blasts out of it horribly wrong. Continuing, he is hit by another shotgun blast, but finds himself grinning nonetheless.

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Oh yeah, it’s toast.

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*paste* Log in to see images!

As the sergeant dies, fine upstanding member of society feels at ease, as if the floor holds no more danger. Relaxing his guard, he explores, grabbing that health globe he saw earlier, and a bit more ammo. Then he finds something TRULY interesting:

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fine upstanding member of society breaks into a cold sweat. He, like all the newer marines, have heard stories of the Phobos base…of the creatures that lie within, of the many promising soldiers who went to their death in that hellhole…and the levers…good god, the levers…he turns to run, but something deep within him, something primal rears its head, screams at him, turns him back around. He runs at the nearest lever, yelling a defiant warcry, and slams it down.

He is greeted by a cacophony of silence. Somewhere in the distance, a cricket chirps.

“Well that was ****ing la-”

*KER-*

*-****ING-*

*-SPLODE*

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fine upstanding member of society blinks. Wow. For a second there, the floor had barrels on it. Then it didn’t. There also appears to be considerably less wall and more scorchmarks than before. Giggling like a pyromanic retard, fine upstanding member of society pulls the other lever.

The walls in the room disappear for reasons only whatever whackjob designed this base can fathom.

Scratching his head in confusion, fine upstanding member of society decides there’s nothing left of value on this floor, and heads down to the next one…

(to be continued tomorrow)

Didn’t fine upstanding member of society pick up a shotgun earlier? Why does he still have a pistol as his weapon?

Equip shotgun!

...shooting the imp several times before it spins in surprise, throwing one fireball just before its brains fly out through a neat hole in is skull. fine upstanding member of society steps over the corpse, walking down the hallway. Running into another imp, he blasts it with his shottie, taking some damage in the process. Stepping into a large room, fine upstanding member of society’s head is suddenly engulfed by a large fireball. Firing a few retaliation shots at his attacker, he darts back into the hall. In the large room, he can see a blood-encrusted staircase signposted as leading to ‘Hell’s Arena’. However, he doesn’t feel so good…

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Ondore Posted:

Use a health pack if you have one, then go kill some more. If you don’t have a health pack, sneak around and try to find something to restore your health.

(we’ve got like 6 medpacks, and small ones restore like 54% on this difficulty. We’ll be fine really Log in to see images!)

Patching himself up as best he can, fine upstanding member of society has some choice words to describe the interesting creatures who gave him his nasty burns. Yelling one of said words at the imp inside the large room, he finishes it off. As it falls, time seems to slow, and fine upstanding member of society has an epiphany he hasn’t felt since he snorted crack 2 days ago…

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PJ Harvey Posted:

Finesse

fine upstanding member of society suddenly feels that his trigger finger is itchier than that one time he slept in a flea-ridden mattress he stole from a hobo. Cheerfully, he surveys the now-empty room. At first he thinks there’s nothing of value, but a shiny, barely-chewed combat shotgun lies temptingly against a wall. Prying it out of its former owner’s dead hands, he tosses the old shottie in his pack (no decision to be made here, combat shotguns are just plain and simple better) and slings the new one over his shoulder. On his way out, he also grabs a fresh suit of green armor lying around.

Heading back to the entrance room, he kicks in the other door, pointing his shotgun at the darkness. Seeing nothing, he charges in. He is immediately greeted by a fireball to the chest, and a shotgun blast to the legs. Hollering in pain, he steps forwards, pumping more rounds into the combat shotgun and firing as he advances. His attackers are soon slain, but he’s in bad shape. Another medpack soon fixes him up, his old armor, however, is covered in more holes than a block of swiss cheese. It’s about as useful to him now.

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Hmmmm, what to do next…

Ondore Posted:

Put on the armor that’s on the ground and keep exploring.

Grabbing the armor and donning it, fine upstanding member of society checks the room to the south. Hearing the low moans of former marines in the distance, he switches back to his pistol. The two he encounters must’ve died while drunk or something, they somehow manage to shoot *behind* themselves because their accuracy’s so terrible. Bemused, fine upstanding member of society continues, grabbing a few health more health and ammo packs along the way, and some small health globes.

Just when he’s about to fall asleep from lack of excitement,

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Oh hey guys, ‘sup?

Did you know that shotguns are effective close combat weapons? Log in to see images!

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Feeling that comforting sensation of safety, fine upstanding member of society ponders what to do next. A few small health globes remain, a lever remains untouched, and there are TWO staircases down: a regular one, and the somewhat-ominous one leading to Hell’s Arena…

LEver first. D: