<zap> What’s worse iggy?

<iggy> what?

<zap> Giving your boss the system dogreat timesentation, all 800 pages of swedish-chef York-desh-born Bork Bork Bork and visio diagrams of many chefs interconnected with kitchen utilities and wiring with various details

<zap> (ie, IP: BORK.BORK.BORK.BORK, System Name: Borka_de_Borka!)

<zap> or finding out that, with the help of the manual, he restored approximately /40GB/ of data spanning 3 DLT tapes (in a very unfriendly autoloader), to the proper locations, with the proper permissions, having never done this before?

<iggy> wtf

<zap> Thats what I thought.

<zap> Even more interestingly, he hasn’t commented on the booklet or asked me about it. He did, however, let a bork slip as he was leaving for lunch today after asking some dumb questions about licensing.

<iggy> ...

I can’t tell you what hotel I’m stayin’ in, but I can say that there are two trees involved. They said, “Let’s call this hotel “Something…Tree”, so they had a meeting; it was quite short. “How ‘bout Tree?” “No, Double Tree.” “Hell yeah! Meeting adjourned! I had my heart set on “Quadruple Tree”... damn it, we were almost there!”

See, this CD is in stores. The only way I could get my last CD into a store was to take one in there and leave it. “Sir, you forgot this!” “No, I did not. That is for ‘sale’. Please alphabetize ‘it’.

I’ve got an oscillating fan at my house. The fan goes back and forth. It looks like the fan is saying “No”. So I like to ask it questions that a fan would say no to. Do you keep my hair in place? Do you keep my dogreat timesents in order? Do you have three settings? Liar! My fan ****ing lied to me. Now I will pull the pin up. Now you ain’t sayin’ ****.

If you drink O’Douls, you don’t drink. But if you drink 20 O’Douls in a half hour, then you’re a ****ing non-alcoholic. Non-alcoholism is a problem too. And there are symptoms, like when you fall down, does it always hurt?

My manager saw me drinking backstage and he said “Mitch, don’t use liquor as a crutch.” I can’t use liquor as a crutch, because a crutch helps me walk. Liquor severely ****s up the way I walk. It ain’t like a crutch, it’s like a step I didn’t see.

On a stop light green means go and yellow means slow down, but on a banana it’s just the opposite. Green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means, ‘where the **** did you get that banana at?’

I think Bigfoot is blurry, that’s the problem. It’s not the photographer’s fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that’s extra scary to me. There’s a large out of focus monster roaming the countryside. Look out, he’s fuzzy, let’s get out of here.

One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said,”Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture of you is when you were younger. “Here’s a picture of me when I’m older.” “You son-of-a-****! How’d you pull that off? Lemme see that camera!”

I like wearing this pbum, because it lets me know when I’m upside down.