A long time ago, early 90’s, i was heavy into tabletop D&D. At the time i had a very strict Dungeon Master who was huge on sticking to your Alignment, creating backgrounds, and mostly having good reasons for what your character is doing/did/will do based on all these factors. That experience stuck with me all the way until now, maybe because i saw the benefits of having a strong and well rounded character which helped with immersion and also for any future bumhole that wanted to question, “Why would your character do THAT?” I actually see that DM’s face in my mind asking that same question when i make a new character for any RPG based on this next part of the story:

We were starting a new campaign, and he stated that for a change i could, with approval, use any monstrous humanoid-type creature as a playable character in his game. So after some thought i decided it would be fun (and challenging) to play a simple Goblin. My DM then “flipped his wig.” He began to berate me stating “why would this simple goblin want to leave his tribe?!” and a long list of other questions that meant basically i needed to make a 4 page essay just explaining the details of this goblins past. I eventually just said “Forget about it” and the events that happened after are blurry and inconsequential.

However, as i said that experience stuck with me, so now when i make new characters for Fallout or Oblivion or GTA or any other RPG i am not satisfied until i can rationalize why my character would just “Go in that abandoned mine,” or “Why would i save the world?” and i now question every ****ing thing my alter-ego would do. I never liked “writing essays” for backgrounds because i always believed that the experience of the ACTUAL GAME helps define who your character is as much as what happened to him in the past. Now on the other hand i have made some of the most remarkable characters that could ever be created and will stick with me forever even long after the game is played by using the “Rationalization Method,” for lack of a better term, so its a catch-22.

I have literally created the most uber-1337 bumkickers for some games but halfway through, and with a pile of bodies in my wake, i think back to my old DM berating me for my poor goblin that was never meant to be and i realize that the decisions that i made with the 1337-bumkicker could never be rationalized and i scrapped the game. Thats right i actually erased the character and started over. This is why i am unable to finish RPG’s, maybe because i know that i lack the creativity and effort to actually create in depth PC’s (like the goblin’s background,) but i am never satisfied with just your average 1337-bumkicker who hoards/grinds and quest-whores.

edit for clarity: TL;DR = RPG’s for hoarding and grinding or back-story and motivation?