Take the hydra, if you will. No, not the mythical creature slain by Hercules, but the microscopic Cnidarian that lives in weeded lakes, one of the lowest of all animal life. They have no brains, possessing only a simple nerve net that acts mostly in a reflexive manner. They’re hermaphrodites. They eat and **** out of the same hole, and they’re transparent so you can watch every moment of the process. They require the help of algae, the sgreat times that collects in a swimming pool, to survive.

You, my friend, are slightly more pathetic and disgusting than the hydra.