i’m really scared and shaky right now.

i’ve been having nightmares for the past four days. i can’t always remember what they’re about, but i wake up sweating and shaking and gasping for breath. the last one i had, i dreamed i was at summer camp and i got into the shower and gilbert gottfried was there, naked. he smiled at me, and i screamed and woke up. it was awful.

at first i thought it was the risperdal causing the nightmares — especially that one where my parents sold me to the Cherokees to be a croupier at a casino — so i stopped taking it, but the nightmares continued.

i think … i think it’s trent trying to communicate with me. i think he’s angry with me for ever believing all those lies about him. how can i let him know how sorry i am?