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JB Presents a Contest for 100 BP: Transgressive Nanofiction! | |||||||
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Aldo_Anything Posted:
reported |
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Posted On: 08/02/2010 6:26PM | View MC Banhammer's Profile | # | ||||||
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He who is a mod But fails to read any posts Aldo_Anything |
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Posted On: 08/02/2010 6:34PM | View SanDyk's Profile | # | ||||||
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Good luck! :-)
Hey… when you get the chance I think I speak for many of us when I say that I would like to see how the haiku turned out. It will have to wait until you’re done judging, of course, but I always enjoy non-traditional poetry.
Also, if JB delivers on sharing his Haiku with us, it has been my experience that Haiku poetry works well for legible writing on mammary glands. (You really don’t want the details.) I think that the long-term happiness and prosperity of the American people may well depend upon a camwhore writing this on her mammary glands, even if we have to get some BP and bribe her to do it! What do you guys think? YiffInHell2 edited this message on 08/02/2010 7:12PM |
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Posted On: 08/02/2010 6:52PM | View YiffInHell2's Profile | # | ||||||
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seconded |
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Posted On: 08/02/2010 8:15PM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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puss mcquack Posted:
Hmmmm…. So at least two of us are into the mammary glands idea, and I still don’t have the Host e-peen… It seems that there has to be some way for this to work out for the benefit of everyone involved. If JB posts the haiku here, I’ve already purchased a ****ton of brownie points that could be used to reward our beloved camwhores for their hard work and sacrifice. It is my humble opinion that we have all the makings of a pretty epic contest!
Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/02/2010 11:03PM | View YiffInHell2's Profile | # | ||||||
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Jalapeno Bootyhole Posted:
Dude, video that ****! |
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Posted On: 08/03/2010 1:54AM | male reproductive organFACEPANTS | # | ||||||
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male reproductive organFACEPANTS Posted:
Do I smell a new podcast in the works? |
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Posted On: 08/03/2010 2:24AM | View Dunatis's Profile | # | ||||||
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I’m going to third Yiff’s idea. One of my life’s goals is to be just famous enough to sign breasts, and this could be pretty close if one of my entries got haiku’d. |
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Posted On: 08/03/2010 8:13AM | View Jubbles's Profile | # | ||||||
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Jubbles Posted:
Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/03/2010 4:48PM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/03/2010 5:07PM | View Jubbles's Profile | # | ||||||
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Performed two (fully original) haiku and was soundly defeated in the preliminary round. My opponent brought a couple “serious” haiku to the table, and the wuss judges were easily swayed. Having nothing but filth and degeneracy in my arsenal, I didn’t stand a chance! Luck of the draw, I’d say.
My second piece apparently had some people laughing and others shaking their heads. I forgot there were some bonafide Southerners among us:
Postmodern ethics
There’s going to be a proper haiku deathmatch in Toronto sometime this year, and I’ll be sure to enter that. Hopefully, I’ll fare a little better! Jalapeno Bootyhole edited this message on 08/04/2010 6:33PM |
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Posted On: 08/04/2010 6:31PM | View Jalapeno Bootyho...'s Profile | # | ||||||
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Jalapeno Bootyhole Posted:
So what you’re saying is, you trolled them, and the mods permabanned you.
I’m thinking there are some people who can’t post on these forums but can read them, who are giving you the finger and saying “How do YOU like it, bee-yatch?” |
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Posted On: 08/04/2010 6:42PM | View MC Banhammer's Profile | # | ||||||
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MC Banhammer Posted: These people stand in sharp contrast to me.
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Posted On: 08/04/2010 6:51PM | View Aldo_Anything's Profile | # | ||||||
Jalapeno Bootyhole Posted:
When I was in high school, I entered an “International Optimist” Essay Contest that had students discuss the JFK quote “War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige that the warrior does today”.
The obvious approach would be to talk about humanity’s history of glorifying violence and perpetuating conflict while contrasting that with the growing accomplishments of peace activism from the 1960’s+.
My approach was to characterize Kennedy as a Machiavellian who slept with Neustadt under his pillow, and that he used peaceful rhetoric to manipulate both his supporters and critics. Since he understood humans who attain power would always use violence to maintain it, he had to use it too (albeit covertly) to achieve his ends while being mindful to entertain the fantasies of those who believe peace alone was possible. This flexing of hard and soft lines of power allowed him the discretionary authority to resolve conflict without hindrance from critics whose good intentions would have otherwise jeopardized his efforts.
My correspondent said I made it to the semi-finals, but while persuasive if my essay was selected he and all his colleagues would have been fired. Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/04/2010 7:18PM | View mterek's Profile | # | ||||||
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Hey, party people! Sorry I took so long to judge this. All that travel and work to catch up on…you know how it goes.
Anyway, some seriously funny entries in here. Some of you have some real talent in this realm! And no, I didn’t judge based on their haiku-worthiness.
First place (50 Log in to see images!→ “Hitler ran his fingers lovingly through Anne Frank’s dark hair. Then he tossed it back on the pile to be woven into socks for submariners.”
Second place (30 Log in to see images!→ “Using a complex system of pulleys and wires, I have animated Michael Jackson’s corpse. Now he can Moonwalk forever. *sniff*”
Third place (20 Log in to see images! great times!’”
Dishonorable mention 1 (10 Log in to see images!→ “Jonny’s sister couldn’t run very fast, but she sure sucked a male reproductive organ at lightning speed. The trick, said Jonny, keep her inhaler until she’s done.”
Dishonorable mention 2 (10 Log in to see images!→ ”’Look mummy, there’s an airplane up in the sky,’ he said on his first, and last, visit to the WTC.”
Thanks to everyone who entered! Next time, I promise, there’ll be some sweet sweet (sweet) E-Peen up for grabs. Stay tuned… Jalapeno Bootyhole edited this message on 08/12/2010 11:52AM |
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Posted On: 08/12/2010 11:51AM | View Jalapeno Bootyho...'s Profile | # | ||||||
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Hooray! Thanks, JB! Log in to see images!
...
I don’t know whether to be proud or ashamed of my accomplishment. But then, that’s Forumwarz in a nutshell. Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/12/2010 4:10PM | View Listen2Reason's Profile | # | ||||||
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That one from Yiff was definitely a winner. Thanks for the 30 beeps, too.
Are you surrrre we can’t convince someone to turn this into a peen contest? Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/12/2010 9:08PM | View Jubbles's Profile | # | ||||||
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Yiff’s was definitely full of win… thanks (Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 08/12/2010 11:28PM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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Thanks! :-) |
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Posted On: 08/13/2010 12:23AM | View YiffInHell2's Profile | # | ||||||
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Posted On: 08/13/2010 4:22AM | View YiffInHell2's Profile | # | ||||||
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