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Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hi You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM Stranger: what? You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM Stranger: are you crazy? You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM You: REDRUM Your conversational partner has disconnected. Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/10/2009 12:19PM | View Jim McPerson's Profile | # | ||||||
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Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You: Pokemans? Stranger: what? You: They’re like Kodak film. You: If you don’t believe it, just ask Bill Cosby. Stranger: oh Stranger: who is bill cosby Stranger: so you are realy a stranger..hah You: Dude, it’s a disgrace that you don’t know who Bill Cosby is. Generations of young negros grew up with his shows. You: he’s like a ****ing legend. You: Really. You: I am dissappointed. Bye. You have disconnected. Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/10/2009 12:33PM | View Jim McPerson's Profile | # | ||||||
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I actually find normal people there:
Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: macaco You: ‘lo Stranger: \o You: o/ Stranger: do you like macaco? You: seen that lates james bond movie? You: oh ok, me first Stranger: yes Stranger: you first You: I don’t actually know what macaco is Stranger: Not, Idont see this movie Stranger: I dont like of 007 You: there are few things on macaco on W’pedia, first match is a technique in capoeira Stranger: Yes Stranger: you are very smart! You: second is a spanish band. I presume you probably meant the first? Stranger: yes the first is a correct Stranger: are you from? You: nah, not smart, just hivemindish. Wikipedia = answers for anything. You: nah, not from Brazil, sorry You: East Europe Stranger: yes wikipedia is father of donkeys xD Stranger: Im not from Brazil =\ You: and you, I presume, are from that warm, sunny country that worships footballers as deities? You: ah, I resume wrong You: *presume You: *this Logitech k/b is a **** Stranger: more or less Stranger: not problem hahaha Stranger: Im now in Argentina You: are you at least a football fan, rooting for some team? Stranger: do you know something about Argentina? You: loads. Good vines, plains and cowboys of your own, Diego the Man You: that nasty run-in with britfabulous persons over Malvinas Stranger: yeeees! you really smart guy! You: altho I lost track of who is currently in power there, left or right wing Stranger: Boca Junior this is my team You: Alright, Boca! You: We mostly cheer for Red Star here, my dad likes them for a long time Stranger: you fan for some time? You: back in 1991 they became european and world football champs. never again will they have a team so terrifying. You: nah, I gave up years ago. After 90’s and all the wars in Yugoslavia football and most sports were ruined You: all the decent players stay here for 4-5 years, then go abroad You: kinda ruins our own league. It’s different in Brazil and Argentina, you guys have much tougher leagues. Your conversational partner has disconnected. Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/10/2009 1:07PM | View Jim McPerson's Profile | # | ||||||
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Stranger: i am god You: Awesome You: Can I ask you a question? Stranger: yes anything You: How DO you get to Sesame Street? Stranger: sesame street is where i met jesus’ mother You: That’s not directions. Stranger: im sorry i can telepot anywhere im terrible with directions You: Pfft. Useless. Atheism ftw! Warning The above post likely contains sarcasm and literacy. Reader discretion is advised.
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Posted On: 04/11/2009 2:37AM | View Naex's Profile | # | ||||||
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Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: heyy, if you don’t like scandinavian blonde guys, you’d better disconnect right away =) You have disconnected. |
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Posted On: 04/11/2009 3:51PM | View Big Brother's Profile | # | ||||||
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Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You: I will give you a 10% off Pizza Hut coupon if you complete this brief 20 minute survey. Stranger: u’re crazy You: What is your name? You: Only a first name is required. Stranger: samuti You: What is your name? You: Only a last name is required. Stranger: sayumi You: How old are you? Stranger: 18 You: In months. Stranger: 3 You: In dog years? Stranger: 1991 You: In what city do you not live? Stranger: many city You: Congratulations. You are now valid to not have a 10% off Pizza Hut coupon. You have disconnected. This has to be the funniest conversation log ever. Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hey You: I will give you a 10% off Pizza Hut coupon if you complete this brief 20 minute survey. Stranger: k You: What is your name? You: You only need to enter a first name. Stranger: shane phillips Stranger: shane You: What is your name? Stranger: shane You: You only need to enter a last name. Stranger: philips You: How old are you? Stranger: 15 You: In months. Stranger: idk You: idk is not a valid number value. Stranger: shut the f*ck up u fabulous person **** Your conversational partner has disconnected. |
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Posted On: 04/11/2009 4:00PM | View Big Brother's Profile | # | ||||||
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Connecting to server… You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You: I will give you a 10% off Pizza Hut coupon if you complete this brief 20 minute survey. You: What is your name? You: Only a first name is required. Stranger: Laura You: What is your name? You: Only a last name is required. Stranger: I don’t want pizza Stranger: sorry You: How old are you? Stranger: 12 You: In months. Stranger: what? You: How old are you? You: In months. Stranger: No, in years Stranger: 12 years You: How old are you in months? You: Due to conversation timeout, you are no longer valid to recieve a 10% off Pizza Hut coupon. You have disconnected. |
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Posted On: 04/11/2009 4:04PM | View Big Brother's Profile | # | ||||||
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Connecting to server… You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hey there You: I will give you a 10% off Pizza Hut coupon if you complete this brief 20 minute survey. Stranger: TL? Stranger: uhh You: What is your name? You: Only a first name is required. Stranger: I don’t have one You: What is your name? You: Only a last name is required. Stranger: I could give you… my social security number You: What is your social security number? Stranger: umm You: How old are you? Stranger: it’s 10 digits You: In months. Stranger: how old are you? Stranger: in seconds You: In dog years. Stranger: in milleniums You: What city do you not live in? Stranger: umm Stranger: finland Stranger: or Asia Stranger: you? You: You are now no longer valid for a 10% off cuopon at Pizza Hut. You have disconnected. |
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Posted On: 04/11/2009 4:07PM | View Big Brother's Profile | # | ||||||
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I did the unoriginal ‘paste from Trapped in the Closet’ trick, and then the guy took it so well i started getting creative. Then i totally missed the perfect opportunity at the end in favor of copy-pasting =\
ahh, regret.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.) Stranger: Do you like pina coladas? You: Welcome to the Trapped in the Cupboard, a text adventure game. Type help at any time to learn the game commands. You are trapped in a cupboard. Stranger: I feel around the edges. Stranger: Commands are for the weak! You: > I feel around the edges. You have: a gun. You: > Commands are for the weak! Sorry, I don’t understand that command. Stranger: Hmmm….. You: > Hmmm….. Sorry, I don’t understand that command. Stranger: I think very hard! You: > I think very hard! You have: a gun. Stranger: I shoot in all four directions. You: > I shoot in all four directions. You have: a gun. Stranger: HEY YOU Stranger: I load the gun first? You: lol the letter I is tripping it Stranger: dude bro! You: every time you type I it gives your inventory You: idk whay that’s very special Stranger: seriously dude You: i shoud get a better script Stranger: you’re supposed to be writing it! You: yeah… You: that would take too long to type as I went You: people have short attention spans Stranger: i don’t! Stranger: back to the game! You: lol You: kk Stranger: I shoot in all four directions. You: > I shoot in all four directions. You puncture holes in the sides of the cupboard. Nothing happens. In the distance, you think you hear screaming Stranger: I say aloud, “Do you like pina coladas?” You: > I say aloud, “Do you like pina coladas?” What kind of crazy lunatic are you? You’re alone in a cupboard. ALONE. No one can hear you. Stranger: I ram my foot into the side of the cupboad. You: > I ram my foot into the side of the cupboad. The cupboard rocks a bit, but otherwise remains the same. This is one of those sliding cupboard doors, after all. Stranger: I attempt to slide the door open. You: >I attempt to slide the door open. You succeed. BONUS: Your score is now 1. How astute. You open the cupboard and step out. You’re in the bedroom of a Chicago apartment. There is a door to your east. Through a window you can see that it’s a lovely spring day. There is a dildo lying on the bed. Stranger: I pick up the dildo. You: >I pick up the dildo. BONUS: Your score is now 2. Free dildo? How could you NOT take it? You shove it in your pants. Stranger: I look out the window. You: >I look out the window. You see the streets of Chicago. There are many fat people wearing Cubs hats and feasting on bratwurst. Stranger: I yell, “Hey fatso!” You: >I yell, “Hey fatso!” The window is too thick. No one can hear you. Stranger: I open the eastern door. You: >I open the eastern door. The living room is especially spacious. There is a door to the bedroom to the west. There is another door to your east. There is a walnut here. Stranger: I pick up the walnut. You: >I pick up the walnut. What would you want with it? Man, you don’t have to pick up every single goddamn thing. Stranger: I look around for more walnuts. You: >I look around for more walnuts. There aren’t any. Stranger: I attempt to crack the walnut. You: >I attempt to crack the walnut. The walnut resists your attack. It seems to be composed of titanium. Stranger: I open the door to the bedroom. You: >I open the door to the bedroom. Unfortunately, the door is locked. Perhaps there is a key somewhere. Stranger: I throw the walnut at the door. You: >I throw the walnut at the door. The walnut is nowhere to be found. That’s funny. You could have sworn it was right there… Stranger: I question my sanity. You: >You have: a dildo and a gun. You sit down on the floor and begin to ponder your existence. Unfortunately, your thoughts are cut short by a vibrating sound in your pants. Stranger: I take out the dildo. You: >I take out the dildo. It’s pink! Stranger: I put the dildo back in my pants and open the eastern door. You: >I put the dildo back in my pants and open the eastern door. The walnut seems to have locked this door too. Hmm. The dildo vibrates invitingly. Stranger: I put on my robe and wizard hat. You: >I put on my robe and wizard hat. You have become bloodninja! You slowly insert the dildo into your bum. At first it hurts, but you soon begin to enjoy it. As it slides in deeper into your rectum, you feel a distinct pressure you’ve never felt before. Thinking you’ve finally found your anal G-spot, you violently thrust the dildo towards your lower intestine. Just as you’re about to climax, you hear a “clink” sound. You look down to see a key on the floor. The pressure is suddenly gone. And you now have a key. Congratulations, homo. BONUS: Your score is now 4. Stranger: I ask aloud, “Do women who engage in anal sex with object necessarily become gay?” You: >I ask aloud, “Do women who engage in anal sex with object necessarily become gay?” How the **** should I know? I’m just a game. Stranger: I ask aloud, “Would you consider yourself inanimate, game?” You: >I ask aloud, “Would you consider yourself inanimate, game?” Who the **** are you talking to, anyways. You are alone in the room. Stranger: I ask aloud, “Would you pbum the Turing test, robot?” Stranger: I take out my gun. Stranger: I question my sanity. You: >I ask aloud, “Would you pbum the Turing test, robot?” Without warning, the walnut appears and strikes a powerful blow to your head with his katana. Your head easily wields to the sharp and powerful blade. You are dead, thereby saving the author from having to answer all those pesky questions you seem to be asking. How convenient. Stranger: yields, not wields Stranger: I rise from the grave. You: >yields, not wields Dead people can’t correct typos >_> You: >I rise from the grave. YOU HAVE BEEN REBORN! You: You are now a zombie! Stranger: I turn vegan. You: >I turn vegan. You wonder why it matters, seeing as there is nothing to eat in this room. BONUS: Your score is now Stranger: I jump out the window in the previous room. You: You find that the window is merely a painting. You wonder how you did not realize that before, seeing as the people are merely stick figures. You bounce awkwardly off the ‘window’. Stranger: I cast Teleport Level 2. You: You do not have any runes. Stranger: I pick up the key and open the bedroom door. You: BONUS: Your score is now -3. You insert the ****-covered key into the tight little keyhole. You turn it ever so slowly. The door unlocks. Stranger: I enter. You: You are in the hallway of an apartment building. There’s an elevator to the south and a large steak on the floor. There’s a bumon on the wall. Stranger: I wonder why this was called the bedroom. Stranger: I press the bumon. You: I wonder why this was called the bedroom. >It wasn’t, smartbum. You: BONUS: Your score is now less than 12. bumon and you’re amazed when it lights up. A few seconds later you hear a “ding” noise and the elevator opens Stranger: I sniff the elevator. You: It smells of pork, which is of no interest to you. Stranger: I step inside and begin screaming. You: You enter the elevator screaming. You wait while the elevator descends. R. Kelly is in here wearing a white suit. He says, ‘Hey.’ Stranger: I ask him for grains. You: BONUS: Your score is now 7. R. Kelly unzips his fly and pulls out his large male reproductive organ, which, like the rest of his skin, is dark brown in color. He begins to urinate on you. The jetstream of warm yellow fluid splashes playfully against your teeth, while rivulets of the golden liquid trickle down your cheeks and neck. You are painfully aroused. You experience an unfamiliar sensation: pure happiness. Stranger: I cry. Stranger: you could be so clever you know Stranger: but alas Stranger: i gave you a chance! Stranger: such talent going to waste Stranger: Your conversational partner has disconnected. Type $connect if you would like to chat with another random stranger. Asian Rapini edited this message on 04/11/2009 9:46PMLog in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/11/2009 9:34PM | View Asian Rapini's Profile | # | ||||||
I felt kinda bad that I won the e-peen with such a simple troll… So, with that in mind, I went back to Omegle to spawn one that’d be truly epic. This is my best so far:
THEY SEE ME TROLLIN’ THEY RAGIN’ BUT ALL THIS HATE JUST FUELS MY MASTURBATIN’ |
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Posted On: 04/14/2009 4:45AM | View JANDEKU's Profile | # | ||||||
Log in to see images!
I'M A SIG-DISABLING COCKMONGLER
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Posted On: 04/15/2009 3:38AM | View twas's Profile | # | ||||||
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Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/18/2009 12:30AM | View wtfmcnuggets's Profile | # | ||||||
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Oh god, this site is epic.
Connecting to server… Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/18/2009 1:32AM | View moblin21's Profile | # | ||||||
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hay You: lolhai Stranger: howya? You: do u like sprite comics? Stranger: Not really. You like mudkipz? You: Not really. Piplup is a superior all-around starter, partially due to it’s developing steel type upon evolution and its superior defense Stranger: ...I see. Your conversational partner has disconnected. how did this get here i am not good with computer |
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Posted On: 04/21/2009 5:01PM | View MMM_AJ's Profile | # | ||||||
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1. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: HI Stranger: from ? You: HIya You: South Carolina!! Stranger: oh Stranger: nice Stranger: f or m ? You: Am a…uhhh You: Hymorphadyke… Your conversational partner has disconnected.
2. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hi! You: HI! Stranger: asl? You: 65/Uni/California Your conversational partner has disconnected.
3. Stranger: Hello! You: HI! You: A/S/L You: NOW!! You: Do IT!~! You: NOW! Stranger: f, brazil, 16 and u? You: ...brazil… You: I ****ING LOVE BRAZIL !!!! Stranger: WHATS THE PROBLEM? Stranger: REALLY??????????????????????? Stranger: MARRY ME NOW *o* -n You: I just had a atomic orgy with seven brazilian guys of course I do!! You: so u were asking… You: oh yea… Stranger: are u f or m? Stranger: tell me your orgy? You: f/dum bum america/14 Stranger: you had a orgy and you have 14 years? You: Yep something wrong… Stranger: tell me this. You: Well it started with my three brazilian schoolmates who transfered from…Brazil Stranger: Uhhm. You: After they had came to my house they started o strip them selves right in front of me Stranger: you have just 14? You: Am serious You: let me continues You: ? Stranger: ok Stranger: continues You: well they started to strip and as they got down to their boxer, I was already generating heat from my Vag… You: I got so hot and wet when they toke their boxers off and started to whack it off in my face… Stranger: and? You: When they were down, with my help of course… Log in to see images! they said “We gonna have a real fun ****ing time!” Stranger: O Stranger: oO You: Their brazilian accents got me so hot that I said that I couldn’t wait for a floopy male reproductive organ to be inserted into me!! You: When they had called their friends… they said”How about an eight way, with seven of us?” Stranger: oO Stranger: and u accepted this? You: of course…all the black guys at school are so unprofessional… Stranger: Ok Stranger: bye bye i will see tv… I was pretending and felt kinda homo afterwords… Log in to see images! “hey how da **** did you fall asleep while playing RE5 and jerking off!?”-Tucci “well…you see, there’s this thing called 4:00 in the morning!”-ME!! |
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Posted On: 04/23/2009 6:58PM | View Donalbain's Profile | # | ||||||
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another one… Connecting to server… Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on. You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hai You: hey You: wanna know a storuy Stranger: sure You: I was busy talking to some other people the other day about how japs are annoying… You: I showed them with charts…it didn’t work You: I showed them with Pictures…Din’t work You: I took them..still didn’t work Stranger: continue please You: So I was on my last breath and finally…I decided to pull out the big guns! You: I showed the what the japanese call cartoon prn or Hentai… Stranger: and then what You: It was a picture of a girl who brutally raped by a tentacle monster You: My fellow friends, Commited suicide becaus eof me showing them that japan is terrible… You: They knew it!! Stranger: same old tentacle rapeporn You: It was a video…it worked Dumbbum!! Your conversational partner has disconnected. “hey how da **** did you fall asleep while playing RE5 and jerking off!?”-Tucci “well…you see, there’s this thing called 4:00 in the morning!”-ME!! |
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Posted On: 04/23/2009 8:24PM | View Donalbain's Profile | # | ||||||
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Stranger: hi You: Yo. Stranger: hi strange man You: You know why they call me STRANGE, don’t you? Stranger: do not know You: Dead babies. Up the bum. HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEH E Stranger: you is very fun… You: I KNOW. HEHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHE HEHEEH Stranger: I just kid Stranger: you not fun Stranger: you very bad You: That’s because you haven’t met me. Go outside. Turn into the alley. You’ll find me there. You: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEHHEEHHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE Stranger: are you a boy.? You: Yes. Your conversational partner has disconnected. Bix Nood edited this message on 04/26/2009 3:16PMLog in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/26/2009 3:15PM | View Bix Nood's Profile | # | ||||||
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OmegleBot: You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.) OmegleBot: hi BurningZebra256: hey BurningZebra256: listen, so i heard about this place through a site i belong to BurningZebra256: it’s called “ForumWarz” BurningZebra256: and a while back, a bunch of the ****s there thought it would be funny to have a sort of contest BurningZebra256: a trolling contest if you will BurningZebra256: and a whole bunch of people came here, and did a bunch of stupid stuff BurningZebra256: which they then showed to others, in the hopes of winning awards BurningZebra256: well the problem is BurningZebra256: they were all retards OmegleBot: ? OmegleBot: mele OmegleBot: ? BurningZebra256: and everything they did was unfunny BurningZebra256: and they posted all this very special **** BurningZebra256: hoping people would laugh BurningZebra256: and no one did BurningZebra256: the end BurningZebra256: *bows* BurningZebra256: $disconnect OmegleBot: You have disconnected. Type $connect whenever you would like to start a new chat. Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 04/28/2009 7:47PM | View Asian Rapini's Profile | # | ||||||
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You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: Are you a vampire? You: no Stranger: I think you are. You: why? Stranger: Well, look at the way you type and the way I type, they’re both very different. You: and that means i’m a vampire? Stranger: All the evidence points to ‘yes’. You: dude, what kind of drug are you smoking? Stranger: Marijuana, I believe. You: where can i get some? Stranger: At your local shop. Stranger: Tell me a joke. You: i can’t Stranger: Fine, I’ll tell you a joke. You: sorry, it’s time for my dinner Stranger: What are you having for your dinner? You: food Stranger: Ha! Very funny. You: give me one reason Stranger: Because! You: not good enough Stranger: Well, it will have to be good enough, I’m leaving. You: where to? Stranger: ... I can’t remember. You: i’ll remember for you Stranger: OK, go ahead. You: you were going to san francisco Stranger: You were going to leave me alone! You: be sure to wear a flower in your hair Stranger: Are you clever? You: when i’m done, you’ll wish that i was clever Stranger: Why are you so mean? Are you afraid that people will be mean to you? You: no Stranger: Are you afraid of bald people? You: no Stranger: Are you afraid of bald people? You: no Stranger: Are you afraid of bald people? You: why do you keep asking the same question Stranger: I want to know. You: no, i am not afraid of bald people Stranger: Neither am I. We have something in common. Stranger: And now I must leave. Your conversational partner has disconnected. |
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Posted On: 05/09/2009 7:51PM | View War Freak's Profile | # | ||||||
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You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! Stranger: hey! You: hi Stranger: could you answer a question for me? You: ok Stranger: how do you speak to me? You: i push combinations of keys on a keyboard which are then converted to electric impulses that appear on your screen as words Stranger: i see. you are intelligent. You: no, VERY intelligent Stranger: you’re intelligent. You: yes, i am intelligent Stranger: thought so. You: i am part of the nic or national intelligence community Stranger: you are quite catty then. You: no, i am doggy Stranger: i am very impressed! Stranger: what are you? You: i am what i am, and that’s all that i am Stranger: were you not programmed to understand that what you just said was very rude? You: i am not programmed Stranger: that’s what they programmed you to believe. You: anyway, i wasn’t being rude, i was merely quoting popeye Stranger: pardon? You: popeye the sailorman Stranger: toot-toot! You: but now i have some orange juice, so i am happy Stranger: good! by the way, what is your name? You: danny Stranger: danny? You: oh danny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling Stranger: do you remember names? You: yes, not for very long though Stranger: you are quite a funny little boy. You: i’m not little and i’m not a boy Stranger: you ARE little and you ARE a boy! You: really? i wasn’t the last time i checked Stranger: i love you more than anyone i have EVER known. You: well, i’m touched You: seriously Stranger: LIAR! You: no seriously, your words emotionally moved me Stranger: there is none so blind as the ones who cannot see You: in the land of the blind, the one-eyed rule Stranger: that’s what they want you to think! You: yes, all about what they want me to think Stranger: so do you like me? You: you seem ok but i really have to go now You have disconnected. |
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Posted On: 05/09/2009 8:41PM | View War Freak's Profile | # | ||||||