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BEAT_WOMEN's Flamebate Posts
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Clbum idea: Neckbeardnanalatinojesus gets you JUSTICE IN YOUR FORUMS Posted:
I kind of wanted to avoid political nonsense for the Neckbeard, in case it fit a future clbum better. (view post) |
03/09/2009 | |
Clbum idea: NeckbeardPlastic Handsome Posted:
That might be under my “HEADSHOT!” ability, though.
HEADSHOT! = neckbeard’s ability to pwn games with his amazing amount of time spent in front of said game, that’s why. (view post) |
03/09/2009 | |
Failchan.Officer: I’m here to investigate your harbumment of others on this website. Your ip address has already been logged and the police department in your district will be notified. AnonyFur: Hello. AnonyFur: Nice try. AnonyFur: Badge number? AnonyFur: Log in to see images! Officer: You are aware of the cyber harbumment division that president Obama recently signed into law? AnonyFur: No. AnonyFur: Are you aware of habeous corpus? AnonyFur: Can I see some evidence? Officer: You’re guilty of offense HR 304 regarding unlawful usage of a public chat program to post offensive material readily viewable. AnonyFur: See above. AnonyFur: Do you have evidence? AnonyFur: Or are you just a failing troll? Officer: President Obama’s recent executive decision allows government officials to confront people. AnonyFur: That, sir, is irrelevant. AnonyFur: That is not relevant to my request of evidence. Officer: Additionally, habeus corpus DOES NOT cover federal investigations, only detainment. AnonyFur: Correct. AnonyFur: My apologies. AnonyFur: Is that how long it took you to google the term? AnonyFur: But, it is fully within my rights to request your badge number. Officer: It’s unwise to not cooperate with a federal investigator. AnonyFur: How qam AnonyFur: How am I being uncooperative? AnonyFur: You made no requests of me. AnonyFur: I’m simply asking questions of you. Officer: Incorrect. Obama’s executive decision regarding my division does not require a “badge number” to be given, as we are a federal investigation group and are not some local police. AnonyFur: Exactly. Officer: I’ve been trained. Now, it’s my turn to ask you questions. AnonyFur: QAlright. Officer: Are you harbuming this site for monetary, terroristic, or for reasons regarding political dissent? AnonyFur: Define “harrasment”, sir. Officer: Are you participating in this harbumment with others in a coordinated effort to cause problems for users of this service? Officer: Answer my questions. AnonyFur: I’m asking for clarification. Officer: I’m an investigator, not a dictionary. AnonyFur: I’m simply asking you to define harrasment in the scope of the law. AnonyFur: Fully within my rights. Officer: It is. Officer: You are correct there. Officer: However, I am not obligated to define the law for you, as per my investigative instructions. Officer: I’m here to ask questions while my office contacts your ISP. It would be in your interest to answer my questions. AnonyFur: If you are unable to clarify your requests, I am not obligated to answer your questions as I do not have a full concept of your request. AnonyFur: Here’s a question – Under what order do you have this authority? Officer: HX 304 AnonyFur: That is nonsensical. AnonyFur: That references no Executive Order I can see record of. Officer: I see Officer: It is recommended you answer my above questions. AnonyFur: The second you give me SOLID proof of your authority. AnonyFur: ie. a badge number, a real legal body AnonyFur: *body of text Officer: Because I am of the online harbumment division, I am not required. I am simply mandated to acquire information, and testimoney while your IP address is being processed. AnonyFur: Well, I believe I’ll rely on the old fall-back: Officer: You may think you’re a lawyer because you listen to Alex Jones, but these questions are designed to filter out false complaints as the ISP is obligated to send logs to my office. AnonyFur: I refuse to say any more without consulting legal counsel. Officer: Very well, that is perfectly within your rights. (view post) |
03/08/2009 | |
Clbum idea: NeckbeardNeckbeards are a quintessential internet stereotype, so it’s very appropriate and not a niche internet poster. (view post) |
03/07/2009 | |
Clbum idea: NeckbeardThe Neckbeard
Secondary Attribute: Body Odor
High frugality, high luck (has rolled many a d20), medium upkeep, Charisma raises as BO decreases. Lower defense and offense. Perhaps lower ego too.
Attacks:
WoW – Neckbeard posts about WoW Linux – Neckbeard posts a unix/linux command, i.e. “echo $QUOTE | grep “I’m a ‘[Rr]etard” or something ridiculously long Dungeons and Dragons – Posts about DnD Rant – Obsessively rants about inconstincies and tiny foibles in movies and (comic) books
Abilities: *HEADSHOT! – posts something like “m-m-m-m-monster kill” or “TERORISTS WIN!” Boosts some stat.
Equipment:
*Something awful forum upgrade *Warhammer 3000 collection *Black Lotus MTG card *Toy Yoda *The Clapper —- with mod chips! *Alien Edition Fleshlight
Items:
Mountain Dew Cheetos Cold pizza (view post) |
03/07/2009 | |
International Day of AnalLet’s face it, men. Every day, all across the globe, women **** and moan to men incessantly. Incessantly. You can’t get them to stop through reasoning, as reasoning with a woman is like reasoning with a dog (except the dog is more loyal).
Hitting women is an available option: however, most men would like to have their women well-trained; nobody likes cleaning up after a dog ****s on the carpet, if you know what I mean. They’d rather the dog not **** on the carpet. Women are the same way, except with feces, it’s usually shoes.
I propose that all men find 1 day where we can find the time, and ream women (be they untaken or our significant others) in the bumhole. One forced and rough day of rectal ruination will make her think twice about not vacuuming; and if she starts getting catty again (as she’s bound to do) you just eye her bumocks and she’ll give in to male force.
And we’ll finally live in a society that’s not full of effeminate bull****.
Log in to see images! (view post) |
03/07/2009 | |
drvytry [p;ovr,pmortprs tjos sote (view post) |
03/07/2009 | |
MOD ABUSE: alt reveal within!scullyangel Posted:
Well, no. Hmm.
How about “BE GENETICALLY DIFFERENT” instead? (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
MOD ABUSE: alt reveal within!Can you put M-M-M-M-M-MONSTER KILL on notes next to me? (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
IRL Troll PollDiogenes of Sinope (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
Hitting womenI’v noticed that whenever I get in an argument with women, they just won’t seem to stop. I did find one work-around though. I use an open palm slap to the face and they suddenly become very respectful. Then I hit them again so they suck my male reproductive organs.
Women: Nature’s punching bags (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
Why murder is good.scullyangel Posted:
It’s ok —- they can join in (or watch) (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
Why murder is good.scullyangel Posted:
If I called you pretty names (Log in to see images! (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
Why murder is good.scullyangel Posted:
trolling (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
Why murder is good.scullyangel Posted:
Who is better, me or Hando? (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
Why murder is good.Killing is my business… and business is goodLog in to see images! (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
I guess my promised troll topic for tonight might not come.Celerysteve Posted:
Is this angyl or some other chick? I know the one i’m thinking of ddosed 4chan… (view post) |
03/06/2009 | |
I guess my promised troll topic for tonight might not come.I found a 40 year old camwhore, so I may be more concerned with that.
Sorry for the disappointment, bros. (view post) |
03/05/2009 | |
BDSM clownsAntiRules187 Posted:
Log in to see images! (view post) |
03/05/2009 | |
BDSM clownsNamaste!!!
Now, I’m not your ordinary forumwarz poster, and I’m sure you’ve gleaned that much from my posts already. I’ve lived a long, adventurous life, and I think the best way to introduce myself is to tell my life story. I believe one’s past is one’s present and future: the trials we go through in life shape us into the individuals we are.
I was born on New Years Day, 1962, and lived a typical life in 60s suburbia. However, I was instilled rather bigoted values in life by my rather irresponsible parents, and I would say inappropriate and slanderous things to people in minority groups. Times back then weren’t quite as progressive as they are now, and I was misled into libeling blacks, jews, and gays as being second-clbum people, non-humans, if you will.
At the age of twelve, I came into contact with a group of homosexual S&M leather bikers. I immediately called them “fabulous persons” and spit on them, thinking I was above them. However, they weren’t pbumive and wouldn’t take any lip from even a young boy who knew jack **** about the world, so when I turned my back I was grabbed, handcuffed, blindfolded, and gagged. They then proceeded to kidnap me.
They then led me into a building and into some room, where they removed my blindfolds and sat me on a chair. I saw 6 gay muscular men, clad in leather, all looking at me. I was afraid, deeply afraid that they’d molest me and do horrible things. Then one of them spoke up. I do not remember the exact words he used, but it went something like this:
“Son, you think that just because we’re gay that you can say that bull**** to us. We’ve had brothers die in ‘nam, fighting for your country, no, our country, and you think you can just think we’re lesser human beings? You think we can’t handle **** the world gives us? You’re damn wrong, boy, and you’re about to find out just how damn wrong you are.”
At that point, I feared for my life and the status of my whitey-tighties. Then:
“See each of us men? We can handle a lot. We’ve been in fights, hell, George here had to witness half his platoon blow up from a Viet-Cong booby trap, and had to limp back to base after falling into a bamboo spike hole. You think we can’t handle your bull****? Well, son, you’re damn wrong. I want you to **** each of us in the bumhole and see if we can’t handle your bull****. You do that, we let you go.”
That night I learned a lot about what it means to be a man, whether on top or on bottom.
I immediately shaped up my attitude towards minorities, and thought about my life’s direction at such a young age; indeed, I would not go into combat to kill people, or into any ministry of hate within America at that time. I would become something people would cherish, something that would make people enjoy their short time on earth. I decided to become a clown.
My early teen years led my initial pbumion into becoming a clown fade with the diversion of left-wing politics. I fought racism and homophobia with all my heart, and while I still retain the core beliefs I held then, I have mellowed out a bit with age.
At the age of 18 my early dream came back in an explosion of pbumion, I decided to enroll in clown college, learning all the tricks of the trade, and graduating at the top of my clbum. I would go to children’s parties and lighten anyone’s sour mood into a rainbow of love and jest. However, I knew something was missing.
I remembered fondly that day those bikers took me in and made a man out of me, and taught me that all people are human beings and that nobody is above another, and that we’re all equal. By pure chance — perhaps the work of God, if he really does exist — I met one of them at a bar and we immediately recognized each other. He seemed apprehensive at first, but after the initial pleasantries he lightened up and was pleased at how my attitude changed. The topic of sadomasochism came up, and though I am not gay, he arranged a date to show me to skills that I had not learned in clown college.
I began hanging out with them, and soon enough I was living a dual life: Wearing multicolor wigs and shaping balloons by day, and whipping someone’s bum by night. It was tiring and schizophrenic existence, and my two pbumions in life almost led to disruptions of identity and a nervous breakdown.
After waking up in my own **** and sweat, I decided to kick my heroin addiction and that I would cease the splitting of my persona. I decided that I would combine my love of S&M with my pbumion of entertaining people as a clown.
I became the most sadistic clown ever, perhaps, honking horns in people’s faces while they tried to **** out the carrot I inserted in their bum. I made people laugh, I made people cry, and most of all, I made life worth living for me once again.
If you’re interested in my life as a sadomasochistic clown, please send me a message and I’ll be happy to respond! (view post) |
03/05/2009 |