jiggaloon Posted:

its weird because im at this age now where i actually have some time to look back on and im picking up the pieces from all this trauma i went through as a kid and i think that trauma is what attracted me to these kinds of places you know? the conflict and toxicity was so normal to me because of my family that i actually sought it out in my social interactions w ppl and its been a process of removing that from my personality. its hard, man. i just went through a difficult breakup and my fear of being inadequate is what did it, and i just wish i could have not had that fear because i liked the guy and i liked spending time with him. it doesnt matter now though which makes it hard to care about continuing the work ive been doing on myself but i know ill be better off regardless

jiggaloon Posted:

im about to be 24 and i feel like such a loser. nothing has worked out how i wanted it to and i dont know whats going to happen. i feel like im not even a real person, like theres no such thing as me, and im in a permanent state of subduction, everything on the surface being pulled down and down and down and heated and folded and compressed into a slurry only to be pushed back up to the surface to briefly harden and then subduct again

Oh wow… I’m actually crying at how big of a ****ing mood this is.