CUT TO:

INT. NIGHTCLUB OFFICE – NIGHT

Black tinted windows look out over a nightclub thronging with dancers, the pounding beat reaching into the otherwise silent office. ANONYMOUS, a man wearing a Guy Fawkes mask, is staring out at the dancers down below, while FUTANARI-MOE is slowly spinning around in one of the roller chairs in front of the empty desk of the office.

FUTANARI: So why did you come?

(beat)

I’ll tell you why I’m here if you’ll tell me why you’re here.

(beat)

Should I go first?

ANONYMOUS: GTFO

FUTANARI: Okay, I’ll go first. There is a girl I know, named Yurika-Chan. I have certain needs concerning her, you see, a very specific need…

Anonymous turns around and walks over to Futanari, wordlessly.

FUTANARI: Oh, would you like to hear more about her?

Anonymous ignores the question and grabs Futanari by the collar before punching him in the face. Futanari is knocked to the ground, and Anonymous pulls him up and punches him to the ground again. Futanari stumbles towards the window, and Anonymous follows, grabbing him by his shirt and throwing him into the window, his face pressed against the glbum for a moment before Anonymous turns him around. He pulls his fist back to punch again, but halfway to Futanari’s face it’s caught by a gloved hand.

VOICE: Try not to attack my clients. It’s bad for business.

Anonymous and Futanari turn to see SHALLOW ESOPHAGUS, a man wearing a black trenchcoat with matching fedora, his face obscured by a white, featureless mask.

SHALLOW: I’m told each of you have certain needs. Needs which you are not able to satisfy under your own power.

FUTANARI: Yes, there is a girl, her name is Yurika-Chan and she-

SHALLOW: I’m already aware of what these needs are.

ANONYMOUS: You can have someone pwned for me?

SHALLOW: I can.

ANONYMOUS: Several people?

SHALLOW: As many as you like.

ANONYMOUS: For cheap?

SHALLOW: Cheaper than anyone else, certainly.

ANONYMOUS: What’s the catch?

SHALLOW: No catch, really. I help new trolls break into the industry, you get whoever you like pwned at low cost, and I take a small finder’s fee. Everyone’s happy.

ANONYMOUS: Except the fabulous persons who get pwned.

SHALLOW: They’re dead. They quite literally can’t complain. You have the payment?

Anonymous and Futanari pull a few bills marked “Flezz” out of their pockets and hand them over to Shallow, who quickly counts through them and puts them in his trenchcoat.

SHALLOW: Everything will be taken care of by this time tomorrow night.

FUTANARI: Do you need my address? How will you get the picture to me?

SHALLOW: Oh, don’t worry, I’ll get them to you.

ANONYMOUS: You’d better get the job done. You’d better get someone good. Don’t **** with Anonymous.

FUTANARI: Who exactly is going to be doing the job?

SHALLOW: A new client of mine. Someone I’ve been trying to make contact with for several days, now.

ANONYMOUS: What’s his name?

SHALLOW: Internet Batman.

Anonymous and Futanari glance at each other, then back to Shallow. Shallow has vanished completely.