Read this.

(Note: yes, I actually don’t have Episode 2, that’s why I’m talking about it. It’s not a typo.)

Chapter 5: The Brownie Points

My mother burst into tears Log in to see images! as soon as I finished my IDC post. 100 BP really meant something in my family, as I grew in a poor environment where people couldn’t even afford Episode 2.

‘I hope this isn’t a dumb joke of yours’, said my level 26 dad as he put down his mouse. He had just pwned Wiccapedia and was angry at me for ruining his solo vanilla raid with my speech.

‘Of course not, Dad’, I typed as I switched tabs. I was winning hard on INCIT that afternoon.

‘Well it better not be. You know that we didn’t get the chance to buy Episode 2 when it came out and we pwned forums all our lives so that you can make it to level 35. Please don’t screw us.’

My 2-year old closed his conversation with Shallow Esophagus. Even at his age, 100 was a big number. And with ‘BP’ attached to it, he was more turned on that a Brazilian whore. He started shouting until he got b& by my mom, or else he would’ve alerted the neighbours.

My dad started crying for the first time since I was born. He asked me where I got them from, as he knew I had a ****ing Maestro card that isn’t supported by ****ing PayPal and that’s why I couldn’t buy BP before and I’m still a level 19 despite my FWZ addiction, dammit.

‘I got some help from BobTheSqueakyWeasel because I entertained him with this piece of crap I wrote that isn’t going to win anyway because someone posted Explosm comics, which are ****ing awesome’ I answered as I was launching a Modest Improvement in Dom.

With all my relatives crying and posting the good news on the pizza party IRC, I clicked the shiny bumon on the Buy Stuff! page and I started playing Episode 2, thinking about what ****ty contest I could enter for Episode 3.

The End