So one day I was reunited with my long lost son. We were so happy that we decided to have relations with each other. He was rough but it felt good.

The next day I went to the store to buy some tortilla chips. The cashier asked me why I looked so happy. I told him that I had just found my son that I hadn’t seen in a long time. Barbara Walters was behind me in line, and upon hearing this she laughed.

“My friend, you never had a son!”

I was shocked! “THEN WHO DID I ****?!”

Everyone in the store replied in unison: “STFU FGT!”

I was so sad that I left without my chips. I went home and ate all my ice cream while I fapped to Simon Cowell. Then, all of a sudden, Xylon busted through my front door.

“Hey buddy, want a fun time?”

Everything went better than expected.