It was a cold and windy morning in Squeakytown; the clocks were squeaking 10 O’clock, and the borough was bustling. “Bother” yawned Bob as he staggered out of the toilet. “I really shouldn’t have drunk so much last night”. Stretching his little arms, Bob padded into the hallway in search of coffee. It was at this point that Bob noticed the supine form of his good friend and occaisional alter ego Zak, lying on the floor. Zak wasn’t in a good state. Stark naked, and curled around a truck tyre that had mysteriously appeared in his living room, Zak had bite marks all over his body, and a large black dildo protruding from his rear end. “Wow,” thought Bob, “that was some party! Note to self: order more dildos.” Stepping over his friend’s prostate form, and gingerly avoiding the large pools of bumorted bodily fluids and alcohol, Bob made his way towards the kitchen, the sweet scent of roasted coffee beans enticing his protesting body forward. Just one more room to go…

Next time on The Often Confusing, Confounding and Downright Family Un-Friendly Adventures of the Squeaky Gang: Will Bob get his coffee? What horrors await in the kitchen? And will Zak let go of his truck tyre? All this and more, next time on TOCCADFUFAOTSG!