DEAR JALAPENO BOOTYHOLE,

FOLLOWING A TREND SET BY OTHER FORUMWARZ USERS (AND THE MODERATION STAFF WHEN THEY BAN PEOPLE) I HAVE DECIDED TO EXPLAIN MY THANK YOU PUBLIC ALLY. MODS DON’T REALLY GET ENOUGH APPRECIATION, EVEN THOUGH FAIL MADE THAT THREAD IN THE UNFUNNY **** POST ALWAYS SECTION OF THE SITE.

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YOU SAVED ME 7BP. MY CONTEST SET TO END FRIDAY WAS RENDERED NULL ON THE VERY DAY IT CLOSED. THIS MEANS I GOT ALL THE WORK OUT OF THE USERS AND HAD TO PAY NONE OF THE BPS.

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SURELY, JALAPENO YOU DID NOT HAVE TO CHOOSE TO EXPRESS YOU APPRECIATION FOR MY BY SETTING A NEW PRECEDENT? AN EPEEN, A FEW SIMPLE BPS— THIS WOULD HAVE SUFFICED. THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE CLARION CALL ANNOUNCING: FIE, BOOTYHOLE CHORTLES AT YOUR WORDPLAY, YOUR MISCHIEFS. YOU ARE HIS BABY BOY. JALAPENO I DO NOT ASK YOU TO BE SO LAVISH A PATRON, DRAWING LINES IN THE LIBERTY OF FLAMEBATE, IMPEDING THE FLOW IDEAS INTO STONE. THIS IS LIKE A BOYFRIEND BUYING A GIRLFRIEND A THOUSAND DOLLAR NECKLACE…IT’S TOO MUCH! I FEAR PERHAPS THAT YOU CAN’T AFFORD IT. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO HIDE BEHIND THE STATEMENT: ALL THE MODERATORS AGREED. I KNOW YOUR FLUTTERING HEART.

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THE TRUTH IS, THOUGH, BOOTY, THAT LAVISH GESTURE WAS A SUCESS. ALL WOMEN ARE WHORES, WE LOVE JEWELRY, AND, THUS, I MUST ADMIT: BEFORE, ABOUT YOU, I WAS MISTAKEN. I THOUGHT YOU A SIMPLE MANCHILD SWINGING THE MIGHTY GOLDEN AXE OF THE ADMINISTATOR, NOW I KNOW THE TRUTH: YOU ARE A SIMPLE MANCHILD SWINGING A GOlDEN AXE…WITH A GOLDEN HEART! AND YOU’VE WON MINE, BOOTYHOLE— NOW, AND FOREVER, I AM YOUR DEAREST FRIEND!

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