All right, ladies, let’s be honest…you have vaaaaaaaaginas!

And all the men here tonight, let’s hear it for having external genitaliaaaaa!

But seriously, guys, how about going to strip clubs, huh? Seeing some titties! Getting the **** kicked out of you for touching the dancers!

But women, you see, they like being treated as equals. It’s true! That’s why whenever my fat daughter’s dance instructor touches her, I punch her in the mouth!

Hey, it’s not like my little girl was going to go anywhere in dance…or real life with just weak legs!

In some countries, women have their clits sheared off with shards of sharp glbum!

In other countries, though, men wear skirts!

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What a world!

Women are pretty bad drivers, right fellas? But…on the other hand…they can’t join the Freemasons!

Women get their own television channel. It’s called Lifetime.

Men get every worthwhile contribution to science and industry!

These days, women can be anything they want to be. Astronauts, pro golfers, scientists. There’s one thing they can’t be…intelligent!

Whoa, whoa, calm down, gals. Must be that time of the month! And by that time of the month I mean you’re all being ungrateful woman's genitalss!

Women are always cold, probably because the heat escapes out their woman's genitalss. Some one could plug it up, huh, guys?

Too bad I left my cement at home!

Kidding of course, it’s back stage. Never know when you’re going to need cement.

Or an IUD, right gals?

That’s the thing…women need all sorts of pills and gadgets to keep from getting knocked up. All men need is the ****ing smarts not to have a womb!

You’re such a great audience.