OrsonScottCard Posted:
Out-trolling a troll:
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Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Lets kill a dog!
You: Let’s kill a small child!
Stranger: Lets kill a panda!
You: Let’s kill the ozone layer!
Stranger: haha we already did that Log in to see images!
You: Damn. Forgot to check that off my list.
Stranger: Oh well, global warming is fake though.
You: Yep. Saw Day After Tomorrow. I know the real deal now.
You: ****ing wolves in NYC.
Stranger: Lets kill a wolf!
You: Sounds good.
You: I’ll wear his head as a hat.
Stranger: Thats pretty awesome.
You: Yep. I drove through Arizona wearing a little girl’s head as a hat once.
You: Human flesh starts to really smell bad after a few days in the heat.
Stranger: Sounds interesting, but isn’t Arizona a bit warm for girl’s headwear?
You: The head was a bit much. I replaced it with her legs, which was much better.
Stranger: Nice.
You: A hat and a snack!
Stranger: Thats just wrong…
You: No, seriously, with a little barbeque sauce it’s quite good.
You: Natural juices and all that.
Stranger: No… Just no…
Stranger: Why have I no Disconnected…
You: Come on, don’t tell me you’ve never driven past a preschool and licked your lips a little.
Stranger: Pretty sure I haven’t
You: You’re missing out, man. Everything tastes better fresh.
Stranger: Pretty sure beef tastes better than human.
You: No way. People are the OTHER other white meat.
You: Girls taste 95% like chicken, and 5% like tuna.
Stranger: Nice to know, what about men?
You: Wouldn’t know about that one, but I’m sure you’re real interested now, fabulous person.
Stranger: okay
You: I’m sure men taste 100% like male reproductive organ. Me, I’ll stick to little girls.
You: Literally. I use glue, helps me catch ‘em easier.
Stranger: You should talk to the police about this.
You: I tried once, but they refused to let me use their car.
Stranger: Hmm I wonder why…
You: No idea, really. The guy seemed really keen in getting me in the back seat, but wouldn’t let me drive.
Stranger: Did you kill him?
You: Nah, just gave him a cut of my last girl. Left thigh, I think.
Stranger: And he accepted it?
You: Hell, he had most of it eaten before I even drove off. Bet he had one hell of a stomach ache.
Stranger: I bet he did.
You: I always favor the center cuts myself. If I have to pbum a few of the flanks off for the locals, so be it.
Stranger: The thing is that human takes so long to produce
Stranger: There is no easy way to farm it
You: But there’s so many of them already.
You: See, for me it’s an easy deal. I just hang out by the fence and grab girls before the Border Patrol gets there.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
