What with all this long cat nonsense, I think we all forgot the original cat: Sailcat.

Log in to see images!

THERE’S DANGER OUT ON THE NATIONS ROADS

THEY’RE PAVED WITH SNAKES AND SMUSHED TOADS

TRUCKERS DRIVE IN RIGS SO BIG

THEY CAN SMASH A COW. OR A HORSE. OR A MANATEE.

AND THOSE WHO SURVIVE ARE A LUCKY FEW

BUT THERE’S ONE BRAVE CAT WHO MADE IT THROUGH

AND I’M HERE TO TELL THE TALE TO YOU.

OF SAILCAT!

(SAILCAT, SAILCAT)

HE WAS HUNTING FOR A MOUSE TO FEED HIS FACE

WHEN STRANGE RADIATION FROM OUTER SPACE

TURNED HIM INTO A SUPER INVINCIBLE CAT

THEN A TRUCK RAN HIM DOWN WITH A HIDEOUS SPLAT

NOW, HE COULDN’T BE KILLED,

BUT HE STILL COULD BE SQUISHED

AND HE LAY IN THE PbumAGE WAY SHAKING HIS FIST

AND SOME KIDS HELPED HIM FLY WITH A FLICK OF THE WRIST

AND THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF SAILCAT

(SAILCAT, SAILCAT)

HE ROLLED AFTER THAT TRUCK LIKE A BUZZSAW UNLEASHED

AND HE SLICED IT IN TWO, LIKE A KNIFE THROUGH A PEACH!

ONE TRUCK HALF TOOK THE HIGH ROAD

THE OTHER THE LOW

AND THE MESSAGE WENT OUT ON CB RADIO

BREAKER-BREAKER WATCH YOUR BACK, BE AFRAID

THERE’S A FRISBEE-LIKE CAT WHO’S AS SHARP AS A BLADE

SO A FEARED AND REVEARED REPUTATION WAS MADE

OF SAILCAT

(SAILCAT, SAILCAT)

HE’D BEEN KNOWN TO CUT REDWOODS AND STOP A WHOLE FLEET

WHEN A FAMILY OF TAPEWORMS WAS CROSSING THE STREET

AND WHEN MA’S HAVING TROUBLES WITH THANKSGIVING PLANS

HE EVEN DROPPED BY TO HELP OPEN SOME OF CANS

AND WHEN SOMEONE’S DEPRESSED OR HAS HAD A BAD DAY

HE ALWAYS KNEW WHAT TO SAY

(DON’T BE DEPRESSED, COW;

PEOPLE LOVE YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE BIG AND FAT AND UGLY

GO WITH IT!)

THEN HE’D ASK FOR A TOSS AND BE ON HIS WAY

HE’S SAILCAT!

(SAILCAT, SAILCAT)