SIG-ENABLING MOCK-CONGLER Posted:

THIS IS AN ANTI-JALAPENO-CONTEST THREAD, TO MAKE SURE I DONT GET THE bumKISSING PEEN

What a putrid putrid waste of a male reproductive organ you are, you ridiculous little mascara face-painted Jerk-In-The-Box. You couldn’t get a date if you bought them dried in a tin, you under-medicated, rump-ruptured chronic self-abuser. You’re the kind of greasy, giggling, girly gombeen who buys STDs from a viral lab just to make it look like you get laid. You’re damn right about being vomit-inducing fugly. You have a face that would give Freddie Kruger nightmares. How much would you change to haunt a house? You’re a politically vacillating phony liberal ****; too damn broadminded to take your own side in a debate. Calling you a pea brain would be an insult to peas, you jellyfish-sucking mental midget. Did your mother leave you in the dryer too long when you were a kid, you little tap-dancing Leprechaun in a pink wig? Be careful you don’t bump your head on the door handle on the way out. I bet the highway patrol make you wear a sign on your fat bum that reads, ‘Caution: Wide Load!’ I bet you have to take your salary to the bank because it’s too small to go by itself, you pathetic ne’er-do-well. That’s a sexy outfit you’re wearing. Who shot the couch? Now, my little ankle-humping hermit, do me a favour and get your foot stook on a busy train track.