Two campers are camping in the desert when one went to relieve himself. The first heard a yell, and ran over to his friend. He was bitten RIGHT ON THE male reproductive organ by a rattlesnake.

“I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs three miles to a small town and finds the only doctor delivering a baby.

“I can’t leave,” the doctor says. “But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.”

The guy runs back to his friend, who is in agony. “What did the doctor say?” the victim cries.

“He says you’re gonna die.”