An armless legless girl is laying on the beach crying and a man comes up to her and asks “Why are you crying about?” And she answers “I’m crying because I’ve never been kissed.” So he kneels down and kisses her then gets up and starts walking away. Now she’s crying twice as hard, and he comes back and asks “What are you crying about now?” She goes “I’m crying because in my whole life I’ve never been ****ed.” So he picks her up, tosses her into the ocean and yells “You’re ****ed now!”

That one’s by Gilbert Gottfried, and of course it’s funnier if you imagine it being read in his voice.

...Well, pretty much anything’s funnier when read in his voice.
1338h4x edited this message on 08/22/2008 11:33PM