I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in my cellar and was told by my

sister to empty the contents of each and every bottle down the

sink, or else…

I said I would and proceeded with the unpleasant task.

I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents

down the sink with the exception of one glbum, which I drank.

I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise

with it, with the exception of one glbum, which I drank.

I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the

whiskey down the sink which I drank.

I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured

the bottle down the glbum, which I drank.

I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink

out of it, and threw the rest down the glbum.

I pulled the sink out of the next glbum and poured the cork down

the bottle. Then I corked the sink with the glbum, bottled the

drink and drank the pour.

When I had everything emptied, I steadied the house with one

hand, counted the glbumes, corks, bottles, and sinks with the

other, which were twenty-nine, and as the houses came by I

counted them again, and finally I had all the houses in one

bottle, which I drank.

I’m not under tha affluence of incohol as some tinkle peep I am.

I’m not half as thunk as you might drink. I fool so feelish I

don’t know who is me, and the drunker I stand here, the longer I

get.