1338h4x Posted:

A snobbish East Coast English Professor is visiting a colleague at a rural university in the Midwest. The colleague takes him to the local cafe for breakfast and introduces him to a few locals she’s gotten to know over the years, including a farmer.

Farmer: Glad to meet you. Where do you come from?

Professor: Somewhere where we never end a sentence with a preposition.

Farmer: I’m very sorry. Where do you come from, bumhole?

This made me giggle, hurr.

1338h4x Posted:

Oh man I saw pure gold at lunch, I was sitting near this group of black guys at a table and they all had tucked in shirts and ****, looked educated, I think they were studying calculus or something. And across from there, there was another table with a bunch of white guys, all ghetto looking, three of them wore ****ing grills, sagging pants, and one was playing some 50 cent ringtone or some **** going “yeah boiiii!” And one of the black guys in the table next to me muttered “****ing fine upstanding member of societys…” I choked on my ****ing jolt cola.

HOLY ****ING **** THIS IS ABSOLUTE GOOOLD

Good God, your’s keep making me laugh like a ****.

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K, here’s another one from me, I’ve got no idea if all the BP have been given out but you’re collecting jokes so I don’t mind giving you one for free.

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So this guy finds a lamp in the middle of nowhere and gives it a rub, and whaddya know, two blonde genies come out. Of course, they grant him three wishes and disappear.

Next thing he knows he’s in a giant mansion surrounded by beautiful women. He has his way with all of them and then throws on a robe and goes to explore his mansion some more.

As he walks through the halls he looks down and money’s started piling up around his feet and all over the floor.

Suddenly there’s a ring at the doorbell. He answers and two Ku-Klux-Klan members are standing there; they drag him outside, swing a rope around his neck and hang him from the nearest tree.

As they walk off they take their hoods off and it’s the two genies. One turns to the other confused and says “You know I don’t get that third wish. I mean, I understand the mansion full of beautiful women and the money, but why on earth did he want to be hung like a black man?”