bellatrix lestrange gets you CRUCIATUS IN UR WAND Posted:

Why hello there forumgoer and potential servant of the Dark Lord, there’s recently been some downsizing in an illustrious organization and now we’re looking for young talented wizards to step up be a part of the dark army!

And you seem like just the type, I can just tell you’ll fit right in.

Benefits:

Immense Power

The Freedom to Kill Muggles and Mudbloods

Healthcare

15% Off Death Eater merchandise

Requirements:

NO HARRY POTTERS

****First three applicants get free wands!!!****

Just because I can’t believe no one has posted this yet, I’ll get in on this action. I can be a wizard too see?

Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.

I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.

I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 male reproductive organ of the Infinite.

I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty **** of the Beyondness.

Don’t **** with me ****, I’m the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.