You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: hi

Stranger: hey

Stranger: what’s goin on

You: me? i’m ****ing ur mother

You: her body’s really great

Stranger: oh so my dad’s watching?

Stranger: that’s cool

You: nah man

You: just me and her

Stranger: where he at then

Stranger: slice his throat?

You: nah man

You: i didnt see him

Stranger: well ****, he’s in there.

Stranger: he’s not out here

You: alright

You: he doesnt care that i’m groping his ****’s mammary glands

You: it’s all good

You: she’s enjoying it

You: i’m having a good time

You: he doesn’t seem to mind

You: since he hasn’t come out yet

Stranger: you better watch your bum though.

Stranger: he might come in for the kill

Stranger: i mean unless you’re into that kind of ****

You: you want to threesome with your own mother?

You: the more the merrier

Stranger: nah, i’ll stick to writing this paper.

Stranger: feel free to ask my dad though

You: cool

Stranger: i’m sure he’s totally down

Stranger: if you look in the drawer to your right

You: o there he comes

You: u got dildos?

Stranger: there’s some weed they keep stashed

Stranger: that’s in the bottom drawer.

You: k

Stranger: the top one is the weed.

Stranger: and the bong is in the closet.

You: i figure i could get your mom’s woman's genitals, your dad takes her mouth, and the dildo in her bum

You: and we could rotate

You: it’s some pretty kinky ****

Stranger: hey dude whatever gets you off

Stranger: i don’t judge

You: your dad doesn;t mind that his woman’s having sex w/ other men

You: ain’t he worried about getting one of dem stds?

Stranger: hey i dunno maybe he digs that ****

Stranger: not like they’re gonna have anymore kids anyways

You: true

You: maybe that’s why your mom begged me to come and **** her

Stranger: yeah, i think so.

You: then she wanted me to take ****s on her

You: that was some really kinky stuff right there

You: then i tied her up and squeezed her nipples

You: o how she screamed

You: did u hear?

Stranger: nah i’m way too into this paper bro

Stranger: try it later

You: k

Stranger: ill try and listen for it next time

You: we got the dildos now

You: she’s sucking your dad off

You: and i’ve got where u came from

You: i’m shoving the dildo up her bum too

You: she’s screaming about how good it feels to be taken by two good looking dudes

You: u deaf or something?

Stranger: i got earbuds in

You: o

You: she’s squirting ****ing everywhere

You: i came inside your mom

You: your dad left most of it in her mouth,

Stranger: oh nice

You: the rest spilled out

Stranger: oh you didnt let him swollow it

You: she says she really liked it

You: dude i wasnt the one getting sucked off

You: he was

You: his choice man

Stranger: oh true

You: it’s my turn to get sucked off now

You: i’ll make her swallow

You: your dad’s got bum this time

Stranger: sounds like a good time

You: i’m shoving dildo into her woman's genitals

Stranger: i’m sorry i’m missing out

You: she’s your mother

You: you and your dad can 3some her anytime

You: keep it in your mother ****.

You: sorry i typed what i was screaming at ur mom

Stranger: hey it’s alright bro

You: mouth not mother

You: w/e

You: it’s hard using one hand on a comp and one hand in her woman's genitals

You: with that dildo

Stranger: maybe when you’re done with my mom you can ride me

Stranger: since i’m a chick and all

Stranger: js

You: sure no problem

Stranger: nice

You: ur legal and all , right?

Stranger: indeed

You: nice

You: so now i came in ur mom’s mouth

You: she couldn’t suck on it any better

You: more

Stranger: sounds like youre gonna kill her

You: nah , she loves it

You: ur not jealous that we’re banging ur mother, r u?

Stranger: maybe a little bit

Stranger: but it’s nbd

Stranger: take your time

Stranger: i wouldn’t want you to feel rushed

You: ur welcome to join anytime

You: your dad just took his male reproductive organ out of your mom’s bum

You: he let loose on her back

You: made this cute ‘S’ shape

Stranger: that is cute

You: i could do that to you if you wanted

You: i still got a lot of juice left over

Stranger: really?

Stranger: i’m surprised.

Stranger: i don’t feel worthy of your cream

You: u sure? you inherited genes from your mother, so u probably are worthy

You: come on, finish the paper later, let’s do it now

Stranger: but i gotta get this **** done

You: ok fine

Stranger: i got a brother

Stranger: you can work on him

You: i’m not gay. we already have 2 male reproductive organs and a dildo

You: to put into your mom

Stranger: hey js

You: now i’m laying on the bed and ur mom’s sitting on me, riding my male reproductive organ

You: your dad’s grabbing her mammary glands

You: she’s getting pretty excited

You: it’s pretty great

Stranger: alright you’re getting boring

Stranger: come on

Stranger: that’s the best you got?

You: that;s cus u want to have us do u

You: but u got that paper

Stranger: i would just think that you had more ideas than that

You: lol we already did the innovative positions. we can redo them later i guess

You: but i see your point

You: we’ll tie her back up and get back to that stuff

Stranger: whatever you want bro

Stranger: i was just sayin’

Stranger: but if you like old fashioned ****

Stranger: then go for it

Stranger: lol

You: which do you like better? so i can prep for when you get here?

Stranger: hey that’s the man’s decision

You: pleasing the women is the man’s job

You: if the women want something special, i make it a point to let them have it

Stranger: i want what the man wants obv.

You: just checking Log in to see images!

Stranger: lol

Stranger: look at you go

Stranger: i’m surprised you lasted that long

Stranger: quite an imagination you have sir.

You: your mom’s loving this

You: you will too

You: my jizz is pretty amazing stuff

Stranger: lol

Stranger: peace bro, thanks for the entertainment.

You: ur still super horny tho

Stranger: hahah not in the slightest.

You: either ur completely lesbian or ur jealous

Stranger: hahahah!

Stranger: no, i just don’t get turned on by text/having sex with my mom.

You: “Stranger: maybe when you’re done with my mom you can ride me

Stranger: since i’m a chick and all”

Stranger: lol just playing along dear.

You: so am i

You: wow this conversation lasted a really long time

You: what’s the omegle record?

Stranger: i know.

You: u think we broke it?

Stranger: that’s what i said.

Stranger: **** i think so

Stranger: well done sir

You: np miss

You: is it ok if i call u miss?

You: or do u want something more formal?

You: or casual?

Stranger: cal me whatever you want.

Stranger: call

You: works for me

Stranger: /b/ much?

You: not rly

Stranger: oh that’s depressing

You: yes it is miss

Stranger: now i feel like a fabulous person for stating that

You: don’t worry about it

Stranger: did you bumume i was a dude in the early stages of this convo

You: ya

You: that way, if i’m talking to a lady, it’s a pleasant surprise

Stranger: hahaha

Stranger: i always enjoy a fun way to slip in that i’m a chick

You: knowing that i’d hypothetically get to ride you is pretty much the “pleasant surprise” right there

Stranger: hahaha

You: would i be the first one in? or have you had others?

Stranger: first one

You: good to know

You: first in all of your holes?

Stranger: yup

Stranger: just turned 18

Stranger: fun stuff right?

You: hell ya

You: i would come and take you right now, but that’d kill the atmosphere

You: finish ur thing quick so u can feel what it’s like

Stranger: i can barely fit 3 fingers in

Stranger: so i think it would be immense amounts of pain

You: don’t worry

You: it’s always a little weird the first time

You: we can start with the mouth. it hurts the least in there

Stranger: haha

You: when the male reproductive organ enters the woman's genitals, it’s a wonderful feeling. painful, but wonderful

You: u seem pretty excited about that

Stranger: about what

You: the entirety of what you’ll get to experience once you come join our party

Stranger: hahaha are you still talking about ****ing my mom ?

You: nope

You: im talking about you now Log in to see images!

Stranger: join our party?

You: sorry. there’s probably a better word that i shouldve used

You: remember my hands aren’t entirely free, so i just used the first word that came to mind

Stranger: hahah

Stranger: well you’re typing extremely well with one hand, i must say

You: thanks

You: btw ur not red now are you?

You: plz rebumure me there?

You: u know what i mean by “red”, right?

Stranger: red?

Stranger: sorry i was afk

You: it’s a thing that women get to suffer through monthly

Stranger: hahaha

Stranger: no i am not

You: good

You: just making sur

You: e

You: cus i dont want any trouble with paternity lawsuits later Log in to see images!

Stranger: lol

Stranger: uhm condom?

You: that’s why i always bring 2

You: just in case

Stranger: bahah

You: just so that the ladies get to feel special

You: i’m a pretty nice guy

Stranger: sound like it

You: so we’re pretty much done talking about your mom and dad ,

You: what clbum r u writing that paper for?

Stranger: ap english

You: lit or language?

Stranger: lit

You: fun stff

You: stuff

Stranger: you bet

You: srsly?

You: i was kidding

Stranger: i was also being sarcastic (:

You: good

You: great minds think alike

Stranger: true

Stranger: so where are you from

You: usa

You: u?

Stranger: obv.

You: i bumume usa since u have ap english lit

Stranger: satewise

You: tx

You: u?

Stranger: il

You: k

Stranger: lol k?

You: short form of “ok”

Stranger: no ****

You: i said “k” first, so i bumumed u were confirming whether it was ok

You: sry

Stranger: so what are you in college, out of college, no college? just hangin out?

You: finished senior year, college starts in september

You: so “summer vacation”

Stranger: oh no way

Stranger: you seem a lot older

You: this is the internet, we can roleplay all we want

Stranger: true

Stranger: i thought you were atleast 23,24

You: until u said ap eng, your essay could have been for anything

You: before u told me u were 18, u could’ve easily be 20+

You: age is just a number

You: this conversation would be much different if i had been 23,24 or if u were 22

You: wouldn’t

Stranger: true

You: i missed the n and the t

Stranger: it’s just interesting to know

You: true

You: so what’s the topic for you

You: r english esay

You: i hit the enter bumon a little prematurely

Stranger: title IX and the effects it has on high school sports

You: ok

You: so ur argument is ?

Stranger: i have none

Stranger: it’s just a research paper

You: o

You: earlier u just said paper, so i bumumed argumentative essay or something fun like that

Stranger: i wish

You: wow my bumumptions are really bad today

Stranger: it’s all good

You: i’m something like 1 and 4

You: ouch

Stranger: haha i’m not judging

You: how bout i bumume ur pretty? that’s good to be a good one, right?

Stranger: and its a true one too

You: cool 2 for 5 sounds a lot better than 1 for 4

You: 40% instead of 25%

Stranger: wow

Stranger: you just read my mind

Stranger: i was just doing the percentages in my head.

You: well i get a little head start since i said it

Stranger: so what are you doing the summer of your senior year?

You: seeing as i’ve already been accepted where I want 2 go, there’s nothing pressing i need to do

You: so i got a job

You: and i work

Stranger: you’re not gonna like take a trip around the states?

Stranger: go crazy with friends

You: b/c of family connections, we fly a lot

You: so i’ve pretty much been around almost everywhere

Stranger: oh lucky

You: this chat’s pretty crazy too

You: it’s been well over half an hour

You: most chats i do on omegle last < 15 seconds

Stranger: haha

You: whereas this chat, neither of us are really trying to win

You: we’re just talking

Stranger: like normal people do?

Stranger: lol

You: ya

You: trolling on the internet is extremely fun, especially on sites like omegle

You: in this chat, trolling became pointless

Stranger: hahah

Stranger: i’m too chill to give a ****

Stranger: plus its fun to play along

You: after about line 5 , trolling became useless, so i figured actually being a person online could be cool

You: playing along is fun too

Stranger: so you must troll a lot then

You: ya

Stranger: hahaha

Stranger: nice

You: pretty fun stuff

Stranger: yeah, well i figure behind every troll there is a decent person to converse with, you just gotta get through the trolling

You: i’d say that’s true for almost all the trolls

You: i never deal in absolutes

You: Log in to see images!

Stranger: i’ve never met a troll i didn’t enjoy

Stranger: once he was done trolling

You: Log in to see images!

You: b/c my hand is extendable and can reach u

Stranger: smooth

Stranger: lol

You: i’m not mr. fantastic tho

You: (the superhero)

Stranger: haha i know who mr. fantastic is thank you very much

You: just in case

You: it’s better to supply extra information and have it be unneeded than to leave something out and run the risk of misinterpretation

You: that’s my philosophy

Stranger: it’s understandable

You: single spaced, no formatting, this chat takes up 9 pages in word

You: that’s amazing

Stranger: why do you find it so fascinating

Stranger: facinating*

You: b/c most omegle chats take up less than 1/5 of a page

You: so this is 45 times longer (better?) than a normal chat for me

You: so it’s time for my 6th bumumption. i’m pretty surprised i didn’t do this one yet: ur pretty intelligent

Stranger: i like to consider myself street smart, not book smart.

You: works for me

Stranger: the only decent subject I do well in is english

You: that brings me up to 3 out of 6

You: 50%

Stranger: nice

You: another 10% rise

You: (from 2 / 5 , 40%)

Stranger: yeah, i remember.

You: ok

Stranger: lol

Stranger: what are you thinking right now?

You: right now? i’m thinking about a game called forumwarz

You: u?

You: either ur thinking about me

You: or about ur essay

You: the former is far more interesting

You: the latter is what u have to do

Stranger: i’m trying to think of way to state something for my paper, yes.

You: Log in to see images!

Stranger: and i’m just trying to figure you out even though we’ve only been talking for a bit

You: yes!

You: Log in to see images! = ???

Stranger: :|

Stranger: i would bumume

You: Log in to see images! makes more sense tho

You: :0

Stranger: oh right

Stranger: well if you think about it they could just cancel eachother out

You: they could

You: but :0 is a much cooler emot than :|

Stranger: hahah i guess so

You: if ur into chemistry,

You: Log in to see images!:

Stranger: hahaha

You: aka O with 2 lone pairs

You: (and two implied single bonds to hydrogen)

You: so happy + sad = water

Stranger: i like that.

You: thanks

Stranger: do you always type something and then backspace it?

You: not always

You: sometimes i type stuff like this

You: from start to finish

You: b/c i know what i want to say

You: and sometimes i type something wrong, so i do backspace

You: c what i mean?

You: ur not keylogging me are u?

You: lol

Stranger: it’s just a pet peeve of mine

Stranger: when people don’t just say what they think

Stranger: regardless of how stupid, irrelavent they think it is.

You: u love what i think,

You: but u wouldn’t love it if i spelled it wrong

You: u wouldn’t love it as much

You: because it would be harder to appreciate

Stranger: there are several things i have spelled wrong in this conversation

You: true

You: but those things are easy to skip over (i’m just chatting, and you probably have some sort of spell checker 4 ur english paper)

You: maybe i’m just paranoid

You: about proper spelling

Stranger: yeah, you’re just paranoid

You: so word-bumociated ocd?

Stranger: it would be hypocritical for me to judge on spelling when i can barely spell half the words i use

You: as long as you can understand it, it’s fine with me

You: as long as i can understand it, it’s fine with you

Stranger: sounds like a deal

You: cool

You: so this is even longer than most of my real life conversations

You: with people i know and talk to everyday

Stranger: is that a bad thing?

You: not really

You: just trying to make conversation

You: since we both had a temporary hiatus from saying anything, i figured it would be good to say whatever came to mind

You: and since ur typing, that;s one more point for me

Stranger: do you not just sit and talk with people?

You: i do that irl , but not for > 2 hours on end

You: i guess that makes u special?

Stranger: i’m honored.

You: np

You: i wish we had this conversation a few months ago, there was a contest for the funniest omegle chat

You: this one would;ve owned

Stranger: lol

You: lemme see if i can find it

You: it’s a pretty fun game actually

Stranger: funniest omegle chat game?

Stranger: they have them on /b/ all the time

You: i found it

You: http://www.forumwarz.com/discussions/view/31419

Stranger: lol

You: pretty fun contest

You: pretty fun game

You: granted, i didnt win that contest, but it was still fun

Stranger: bogus

You: wow u really r pretty smart,

You: u saw right through that

You: maybe b/c that was a white lie and it’s nighttime?

You: stands out

You: a lot

Stranger: its possible

You: it is

You: that’s why i mentioned it

You: Log in to see images!

Stranger: + Log in to see images!

Stranger: = water

You: lol

You: u remembered

You: here’s another good bumumptionn: u don’t already play forumwarz?

Stranger: i do not.

Stranger: i’m a /b/ fabulous person.

You: so i’m at 5/8

You: aka 62.5%

Stranger: nice

Stranger: more than half

You: lemme see if i can get a pbuming grade

Stranger: hahaha

Stranger: 62 is a d

Stranger: so technically

Stranger: you’re pbuming

You: 70 is pbuming where I go to school

You: i was user our strange, non-standard system

Stranger: ohh

Stranger: well then only a few more bumumptions

You: if i make them now, it’s less dramatic

You: so one of us needs to say something that can lead to an bumumption i can make about you

You: Log in to see images!

Stranger: hahah

Stranger: i’ve only gotten 3 sentances done for my paper.

Stranger: and i’ve been working on it since 11.

You: but u would hate it if i stopped talking

You: right?

Stranger: i thoroughly enjoy your company yes

You: that makes me happy to be here

You: i enjoy your company too

You: it’s nice to talk 2 ppl

You: it makes the idea of talking to a person more realistic

You: when ur trolling, it’s very formulaic

You: ie unoriginal

Stranger: why do you troll

Stranger: just to get laughs?

You: u stole the words right of my mouth

You: also, it;s hardwired into my system

You: that last statement about trolling isn’t always true

You: i’ve trolled some very unique ppl in very original ways

Stranger: example?

You: like a specific user i’ve trolled or just a synopsis?

Stranger: synopsis

You: some ppl have unique situations that are easy to exploit, mixing words into something that’s quite different

You: this game has a leaderboard of the number of friends each person has

You: so the person at the top has 666 friends.

Stranger: devil

You: she said something rather intelligent.

You: yup devil

You: i took it and turned it into a statement about her selfishness (not letting other ppl be at the top) and satan-worship

You: it’s a lot cooler in practice

You: b/c u dont get to see the reactions that I got to see from that user

You: b/c i dont know where that thread is

Stranger: sounds amusing

You: it was

You: (u do mean that, right? ur not just saying that to make me feel good)

Stranger: of course i mean that

You: thanks.

Stranger: anytime.

You: alright

You: by anytime, i’m guessing u mean “anytime b4 1 of us falls asleep”?

Stranger: no,

You: really?

You: then how often are we talking?

Stranger: depends

You: btw that’s not an invite to make me feel bad just to cheer me up

You: Log in to see images!

Stranger: haha what?

You: nvm

Stranger: wellllllllllllllll, the question is do you want to move this from omegle ?

You: where r u suggesting?

Stranger: msn, aim?

You: gmail?

Stranger: ew, really?

You: ew? u dont like gmail?

Stranger: no

You: o

Stranger: i don’t even have a gmail account

Stranger: lol

You: lol Google doesn;t bite

Stranger: true

You: the problem is that i lack msn/aim

You: and gmail is easier

Stranger: how is that possible?

You: remember, i’m special too/

You: plus all the friends i actually know use gmail

You: afaik, maybe like ‘1’ of my friends actually has an aim account?

Stranger: samsayssm1le@gmail.com

You: isn;t that kinda risky to just say that in an internet chat with a guy u dont even know?

Stranger: i’m a risk taker.

You: i’ll add u

You: risky and pretty and intelligent

You: how much better does this get?

Stranger: i don’t know

Stranger: we’ll have to wait and find out

You: u get to find out a lot when u finish that essay Log in to see images!

tl;dr posting in anon is fabulous persongy anyway

this chat took over 4 hours for me to win

i didnt read it i wouldnt know

tldr. also why post it on anonymous?

Anonymous Posted:

why post it?

Anonymous Posted:

why post it?

b/c it was epic

do u want this to be reposted in the trollhole?

Anonymous Posted:

Log in to see images!

sage