You are currently looking at Flamebate, our community forums. Players can discuss the game here, strategize, and role play as their characters.
You need to be logged in to post and to see the uncensored versions of these forums.
Tarman's Flamebate Posts
View Tarman's Profile
| Search Results | ||
|---|---|---|
|
So I ordered a "fleshlight" and now my parents think i'm a pervif only i was win enough to make up things like this… but alas (view post) |
07/27/2008 |
|
|
So I ordered a "fleshlight" and now my parents think i'm a pervBirdofPrey Posted:
Exactly. And it works. (view post) |
07/27/2008 |
|
|
So I ordered a "fleshlight" and now my parents think i'm a pervOK, it’s not a flesh light… It’s a “Lexie UR3 Pocket woman's genitals” and even more blatantly a place to stick your wiener than a flesh light. I had planned on EdenFantasys’s discreet shipping policy to save me from any embarrbuming moments with the parents or neighbors, but I think it went far worse than I could have imagined…
http://www.lovedreamer.com/main/popup.c … 6_bx_l.jpg I’m surfin’ the net one day when I stumble across a promotion for this sex toy. I’ve never been interested in sex toys before, but all of a sudden I got really into the idea. I’m not a lame-rear end who can’t get any real sex. (I currently have a girlfriend with a REAL woman's genitals) No, I just thought it might make for a good time for when I was bored and had no motivation. So I say, “**** it!” and order the damn thing.
I track it online and plan it to be delivered on a day when my parents are gone…
The day comes and I lay watchful of the mailbox… I am ready to snatch up the package before anyone can see! And… it never comes.
I am scared all of a sudden. The online tracker says the item has been delivered! I call the post office and the woman has to take a report so I have to tell her that the contents of the package was a sex toy and that it never showed up. A couple hours later a guy from my local post office calls me and says, “So Mr. Zoo… it says here you ordered a sex toy and it never arrived? Yeah well… The postman scans it then puts it in your mailbox, so it was definitely delivered. I don’t know what to tell you. Someone must have stolen it.”
I’m like ****, oh well… At least I didn’t get embarrbumed in person.
A week goes by and I totally forget I even ordered it. And it turns out I don’t even want it anymore because I started having sex with this girl I went to high school with. (Same girl as stated above. It’s a very new relationship.) All is well in the Zoo household… until…
Today I wake up from a nice long sleep and open my bedroom door to find an odd package on the ground all ripped up with a note on top. http://i33.tinypic.com/51d35g.jpg
OH GOD!!!
The freakin pocket woman's genitals is sticking out of the side of the box. And there’s a note from my mom AND the neighbors!?
I open it up to find that jiggly pink thing outside of the inner box so it had DEFINITELY been opened. I’m sure the neighbor probably opened it up and whacked his wife on the head with it or something before thinking of returning it.
http://i38.tinypic.com/wl5cp0.jpg I mean he could have even used it! My mom was right- That’s GROSS! So basically now everyone thinks I’m a perv.
I’m waiting for my parents to come home from dinner right now… What should I tell them? (view post) |
07/27/2008 |
|
C-C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKERlol (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
Let's all use the mirroring character!BAN ARBITRAYER FOR EXPLOITING THE MIRROR CHARACTER (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
My name is Sarah M. and no you cant know my full name. dont ask for nudes and i dont want to see your male reproductive organ thats disgusting.My name is Sarah M. and no you cant know my full name. dont ask for nudes and i dont want to see your male reproductive organ thats disgusting. I love relationships but i also love wild times. I’m the only girl of 4 brothers yeah boys watch out. I made this just to get friends not to get a bf or make people hate me. I live in North Carolina and i’ll be a senior next year. I can be a total girly girl but i love getting dirty. I like to go mudding and ride dirt bikes. I love boys with tattoos and piercings. I only hate people that are disrespectful. Get to know me and don’t judge. I have myspace and aim. You can have my aim and i might give out myspace. (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
POLL: Which is the best klan?SotQR (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
sisterhood of the blah blah blah klan are sellouts!doug05257 Posted:
ur a fabulous person (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
Creating a Klan for CamwhoresI wish I was a camwhore (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
:shotgun:rofl (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
DOMINATION THEME WEEK: July 16BINGEBOT 2015 Posted:
Log in to see images!
I approve of no ties. The modified bumhole is…. interesting. I don’t feel like it has any noticeable impact, because in the competitive brackets people rarely go above 4 scoops. (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
Have any of you ever had sex?What’s it like? (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
Pandemic 2 in one .gif imageLog in to see images! (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
How are you doing?CHALKONEUPTODALORD Posted: |
07/26/2008 | |
How are you doing?I’m doing well. Meee told me to post. (view post) |
07/26/2008 | |
|
dead forumn00b65 Posted:
You mean the other 12 threads weren’t obvious? >_> (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
dead forumStart posting, fabulous persons (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
Am I a bad person?meeeeeeeeee Posted:
Why are you so mean to me? (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
Am I a bad person?Yes? No? What do you think? (view post) |
07/26/2008 |
|
|
STOP BEING MEAN TO MEITS MEAN (view post) |
07/26/2008 |