Forumwarz is the first "Massively Single-Player" online RPG completely built around Internet culture.

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Attributes

Primary Attributes

Attribute Description
Ego The lifeblood of any successful Pwner. If you have not figured out already, this is your HP. If it hits zero, YOU DIE. So don't suck male reproductive organs. Your health points. Bigger The Ego, Bigger the male reproductive organ.
Clbum-Specific Stats The equivalent of Mana in many other RPGs. Most clbum-specific attacks and abilities consume their clbum's secondary statistic. If you don't have enough to pay for an ability, you cannot use it. Like Ego, your secondary stat is fully replenished upon entering battle.
Pwnage This meter is the level of **** you have inflicted upon a thread. Technically it is the thread's HP backwards; get it to 100% and smell sweet sweet victory. The thread's damage.

Secondary Attributes

Attribute Description
Alignment Luke Skywalker or Darth Vader, Batman or Joker, Coke or Pepsi, choose wisely. (or follow the spoilerific instructions to eventually be found on the Alignment page)
Charisma This is the number that decides if you're likable or not (more likable = more gifts). Increases the number of gifts you receive at rollovers.
Defense You must have more of this to have unbeatable stamina and resistance to damage, and if you don't... well you'll be sucking concrete after every forum counterattack. Higher defense will also make forums miss more often. Decreases the damage you take from threads, also decreases the chance of you being hit by them.
Frugality You want more bang for your buck? Get this up and sales prices will bend to your will (metaphorically speaking of course). Decreases the price of buyable stuff in stores, increases the selling price of your items at Ppwn Shoppe.
Luck The more of this you have, the more Jesus loves you. It seems to influence how valuable the gifts that random Internet strangers send you are. Surprisingly, making many feel cheated, it does not improve your chances with the Gamble-Bot. It is possible that the random sections of attacks are affected by this. Increases the number of gifts you receive at rollovers. Good for characters that can't stack Charisma.
Offense Fill the pwnage meter faster as you dish out the most powerful insults, slander, and plain vulgar rudeness that anyone has seen as you increase this attribute. Increases the damage of your attacks.
Upkeep Make your crappy equipment just a little less crappier (which still makes it crappy), because with this your **** won't break down as often (but don't get your hopes up). A few points of Upkeep and you won't be running back to Bruce Bear's after every battle. Reduces the durability hits on your gear.
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