I have AWESOME friends.

One has a collection of literally hundreds of firearms, small ones and big ones and loud ones and quiet ones and legal ones and illegal ones. Idk why he’s got them, but he does. He took me out in the woods once a long time ago to shoot AK-47’s, it was a blast. His grandmother used to tell him the future when she was still alive. He still remembers her drowning kittens in the bathtub so as not to have a farm overrun with cats. He ate mayonnaise out of the jar with a spoon like it was ice cream or some ****.

I’ll be back later with another one, I dunno who else to write about right now.