Okay took my time to write them all down

[Hovered Image]:[Description]

Camwhore: “If i get the right angle, nobody’ll be able to tell I’m a fat pig! LOL!”

Emo Kid: “Pwning Forums is almost as much fun as cutting myself.”

Hacker: “That’s real cute pbumword you’ve got there, noob.”

Troll: “Dear Internet, **** YOU! Heh, heh.”

Permanoob: “Duhhhhhhh…baseball, YAYYY!!”

Random pbumer by: “This could be you, uf you CLICK HERE RIGHT NOW!”

“Open shield”: “Like your mom’s legs, we’re always open. And free! And hairy.”

“Drugs `R’ Fun” Shield: “Need a health boost? Drugs “R” Fun will hook you up.”

sTalk sign: “Stalk your favorite characters with sTalk, our in-game instant messenger!”

“Ppwn Shoppe” sign: “Buy and sell game equipment at The Ppwn Shoppe, “Where half the Ps are silent.””

Excre-Bot 5000: “Meet Excre-Bot 5000, you corophagic robo-guide to this wonderful world.”

Camwhore bag: “This cosmetics tote bag keeps the Camwhore’s Sexiness quotient totes maxed out…to the max!”

Camwhore mammary glands: “Epic bewbs – the Camwhore’s deadliest weapons.”

Camwhore webcam: “No Camwhore is complete without a cheap, low-res webcam.”

Emo coffee: “The caffeine makes your heart beat faster, so you can bleed more!”

Hacker code: “ASCII pr0n, translated into binary = hawt.”

Troll liquor: “This malt liquor keeps the Troll’s Douchebaggery meter throbbing.”

Permanoob baseball: “This is a horse. What the **** did you think it was? Honestly.”

Troll tissues (at his feet): “You don’t want to know what these tissues were used for! (Fapping.)” <— “fappging” is blinking

Stuff at the discounter:

Sadwiches that look like cake: “These sandwiches are for display purposes only. DO NOT CONSUME.”

Soda cans: “Forumwarz: The only game were PowerthristTM is an energy restauration item- Guaranteed!”

Cola or liquor: “Okay now you’re just looking for tooltips. Play the damn game already.”