Hello. You may know me as ‘that guy who critiqued My Immortal, thereby completely missing the point’. Well, I have a project I’ve been working on, and if I don’t announce it to a large audience, it will likely never get finished. Bizarrely, it has nothing to do with any of my previous projects, hard as that may be to believe.

It is called The Hitman (A working title, of course, and before you ask, yes, I am aware of the popular game series), and it is a dark tale of lies, corruption, goats*, and murder. Mostly murder. You play the titular Hitman, beginning a seemingly simple nights work that will lead him to discover much about the shadowy government organisation that employs him. Bear in mind that this project is relativity young, and will likely incubate for some time before it is ready for public consumption. That said, It should be released before Duke Nukem Forever 2 goes gold, by which I mean the second coming of Christ.

Just to quell your fears that this may actually be a quality game, let me leave you with these parting words:

“King Krimson is going to treat you with the love and respect you deserve.

Suck it down.”

Thoughts? Comments? For instance: ‘Could I possibly have been any more condescending?’ ‘Why do I act like a male reproductive organ when I know you all hate me anyway?’ and ‘What am I doing with my life?’ Well, I’ll be happy to answer any questions. Providing any of you actually give a ****.

*Does not actually contain goats.