Reccomended by King for ripping apart, im going to be posting the chapters and finding all of the annoying little bits in it to point out. Huzzah
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(1st chapter)
One day Frodo was in his room builfing a time machine and he said to Sam
Already we have a spelling mistake.
“Come over her and look at this I built it” and Sam kissed him and they started to make out and then Sam got an erection!
Because that makes sense.
“Not now” said Frodo and he showed Sam the time machine. We need to go in the time machine to another time and we can have all sorts of sex with everyone!
What happened to quotation marks? Also, lol wut?
And Sam agreed that this was a good idea and then they stepped in the time machine and flashing lights surrounded them and their vision swirled and felt as if they were going to lose concousiness, but they didn’t!
ORLY?
Instead, it felt like their male reproductive organes got 1,000,000,000 times bigger! Sadly, they didn’t really. There was huge jolt and they landed on top of eachother and started making out!
...What?

Sam took his male reproductive organ out of his pants and was about to show Frodo that he did and then just then a boy with black hair and glbumes and green eyes and a scar on his forehead.

He walked up and said “What are you two doing! Little kids shouldn’t be here, especially little kids shouldn’t have sex!”
Grammar. Also, pay attention to the fact that Harry thinks kids shouldn’t have sex
“We aren’t little kids!” they said and they out Sam’s male reproductive organ back in his pants (It took both of them because Sam’s male reproductive organ is so big).
GRAMMAR.
“What are you then?” Harry asked knowingly.
GRAMMAR!
Frodo and Sam got scared and ran away and then had sex in the bushes and Harry walked over to the bush because they hadn’t run very far. The sight of such nudity and thrusting and sploodge made Harry get all hot and then he jointed in! He got oral from Sam and Frodo at the same time! Sam also had his male reproductive organ in Frodo.
If you payed attention, then you realise harry has contradicted himself.
They all finished and pulled their sticky male reproductive organes out of the others oricices and then Harry was so happy withn them
Lets not forget spelling!
that he said “I’m going to adopt you little kids.”
Harry already has 3 kids, why try and handle 5?
Frodo and Sam were so happy that they didn’t bother to correct them about there not being children.
And back to grammar!
TO BE CONTINUED…
Christ…On to the second chapter; ‘Snape has a plan’
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(Chapter 2)
Thanks for thew review! It’s not a parody, but I’m happy you like it anyway. PORN IS SO HOT! Just cuz I’m 13 doesn’t mean I can’t write porn good, LOL!
You have bad grammar and spelling, you can’t write a decent plot, and you write half-bumed porn. Yes, being 13 DOES mean these things
Harry walked to the school with his new adopted kids (that were’nt really kids)
WEREN’T, you fool!
and then they went ot his bedroom where he had a cage for them. He put on his hott bondage gear and it had a leather speedo and fishnets on it and he had a chains around his arms and legs and prostate and he had a spiked leather collar. He brought out his whip and tied them to a wall with handcuffs that were leather.
How did he wrap a chain around his ****ing prostate?! Did he stick the chain up his bum?

“Ahhh!” Sam moaned as he had his nipples played with by Harry. Frodo got jealous.
Not only does he contradict himself, he has sex with his ‘kids’!
Then he wasn’t jelous as Harry began to touch is male reproductive organ. Then Harry suprised them. Harry suprised them when he struck at them with his whip and they moaned in pleasure and pain as they’re blood fell on to the floor.Harry licked it up. “Mmmm” he said and then he has sex with thme and used there blood as lube.
If harry licked up all the blood, how did he use the blood as a lube? Also, spelling. Do it.
They loved it soo much that they filled the room with shouting and moans and then Snape came in! (no pun LOL!)
No. No! Bad SotP!(Song of the past, the writers name, im not going to bother writing that out everytime that i want to mention her)Thats not funny! Thats sad.
Harry didn’t notice and continued to **** Frodo’s body. Snape took 1 look at what was going ona nd he turned around and left, to decide what he was goign to do about Harry having sex with little children with wips and gear. Snape was secretly just plotting to take them away from Harry and use them as his own sex slaves because he had kinky fantasys about doing little children and making them cry.
Spelling. Spelling? SPELLING!
Harry layed his load in Frodo’s bum before he untied Sam and made him suck Harry’s dripping probiscis.
Why would harry’s male reproductive organ be sticking out of his head?
Sam deepthroted it and gripped Harr’ys balls with his muscler garndener hand as her shoved Harry’s male reproductive organ in and out of his mouth.
Spelling AND Grammar? No.
Harry sprayed his man-juice into Sam’s throat and Sam swallowed it and before he knew anything Frodo started to kiss him and to rub Sam’s male reproductive organ and play with the tip and then he wanted it in his bottom because he really liked that. Harry watched a bit tiredly because of all the sex he had.
Lol wut?
Sam gripped Frodo’s legs and moved them apart “I’m going to **** you through the mattress”
...?
he said and he put his male reproductive organ deep into Frodo’s welcoming chasm.
lololol
“Oh, Sam, you’re my dream man!” Frodo screamed with pleasure as Sam pounded him hard. Then Sam pulled out before he came and came on Frodo’s face instead of in his bum and Frodo totally loved it. Then Harry licked it all off. They went to sleep so that Harry could not be tired during all his clbumes the next day.
What…The…****?
—The Next DAy—

Harry woke up and the sun was shining through his window. He got up and streteched as he yawned. “I’m a little sore from last night” he mumbled as he rubbed his sore limbs. He looked around for Frodo and Sam but didn’t see it.
THEM.
“Where can they be!” he asked a little bit worried that maybe they ran away from him. Then he didn’t worry as much because he thought maybe they were having sex with eachother somehwere. Then he got dressed and his books so he could go to clbum. He hoped he would see Ron and Draco because he wanted to tell them about the good sex he had with Frodo and Sam the night before. They would surely love to meet them and probly to have sex with them.
Really now? Ron and Draco would want to have sex with your ‘kids’?
TO BE CONTINUED…
Please, no more
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Ill be reviewing the next two in a while. Right now my brain cells need to recover from the losses.