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Big_Mike's Flamebate Posts
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petition to replace incit with werewolfSigned Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/14/2010 | |
This thread died before it was started.Aldo_Anything Posted: |
10/07/2010 | |
Unwiped bum (10 BP) - NSFWman-man Posted:
Ahhh. Babies, gotta love’em (view post) |
10/07/2010 | |
Good times for INCITSanDyk Posted: (view post) |
10/07/2010 | |
I askBacchus Posted: |
10/06/2010 | |
BoredmnSanDyk Posted:
2 posts? He has posted on a bunch of threads. Maybe we see something different?Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/06/2010 | |
BoredmnSo, I’m tired of seeing this “Anonamus” person all over the recent topics. I’m just gonna rant. Ok? Ok. Lets talk about Twilight. A few weeks ago I had the miserable experience of reading Twilight. I knew it was going to be crappy, but I thought it would be a guilty pleasure kind of crappy – where you know it’s bad but you still get enjoyment out of it. I actually managed to power through around 400 pages until I gave up and started reading Sky Mall. I’ve been seeing Twilight everywhere lately, especially with
First off, the author creates a main character which is an empty shell. Her appearance isn’t described in detail; that way, any female can slip into it and easily fantasize about being this person. I read 400 pages of that book and barely had any idea of what the main character looked like; as far as I was concerned she was a giant Lego brick. Appearance aside, her personality is portrayed as insecure, fumbling, and awkward – a combination anyone who ever went through puberty can relate to. By creating this “empty shell,” the character becomes less of a person and more of something a female reader can put on and wear. Because I forgot her name (I think it was Barbara or Brando or something like that), I’m going to refer to her as “Pants” from here on out.
So after a few chapters of listening to Pants whine about high school, sucking at volleyball, and being the center of attention, the second major character is introduced. Imagine everything women want in a man, then exaggerate it by ten thousand – and you’ve got Edward Cullen. The level of detail that the author goes into while describing Edward’s appearance is remarkable. At one point while reading I started counting the number of times the author used the expression “Edward’s perfect face,” and it was far into the double digits. The author excruciatingly details his muscular pecs, clothing, hair, eye color – even his goddamn breath (I’m not joking).
Edward intensely listens to everything Pants has to say, even if she’s ****ing about she had diarrhea on Christmas or her preferred method for cutting a sandwich in half. As far as the reader is concerned, Edward cares about nothing in the world more than Pants. What the author has done is created a perfect male figure – a pale Greek statue which the reader can worship and in turn be worshipped by.
So what about men that like Twilight? If you’re male and you like Twilight, you’re gay. I don’t mean that in the derogatory sense, I mean it in the “you want to put your testicles against another man’s testicles while gripping handfuls of chesthair” kind of way.
And the movie? The movie is just the same uninspired crap shat out onto a film reel. If you like the taste of horse manure on your bologna sandwiches, you’re probably gonna like it on your birthday cake as well. The same principle applies with Twilight.
Beyond that, it’s just a romance novel with the occasional vampire teen drama bull**** peppered here and there. It doesn’t really break any new ground in the realm of vampire fiction, other than portraying vampires as a family of uncomfortable retards who prance around the woods eating deer and bunny rabbits. There’s lots of nervous lip-biting, tender kisses between Pants and Edward, and lengthy descriptions of every feature of Edward’s body. Pants is a static character who never really progresses beyond being an insecure vampire fangirl who obsesses over Edward. Whether her character grows beyond that is unknown to me, I’d stopped reading by then and shifted my attention to an electric bum-mbumaging chair in Sky Mall. (view post) |
10/06/2010 | |
totally serious question about necropheliaThis has been an interesting read. The “living dead” is a contradiction Even if you did “do something” with a zombie, you expose yourself to whatever turned that person into a zombie. Gives a whole other level to STDs. But in the end, I don’t know. Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/06/2010 | |
left 4 dead sorta contest thingI meant multiplayer. My bad haha.Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
left 4 dead sorta contest thingduca Posted:
The story IMHO is very good. Play all of the Halos, then play Reach. Mind=Blown Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
left 4 dead sorta contest thingLee_Harvey_Oswald Posted:
Woah now, the beta? there’s your problem. Play some of it now. Sure it isnt perfect, but is any game? (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
What is your Religious Preference.Buzz Killington Esq Posted:
Then Hitler happened, right? (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
Describe video games in haikuHaikus can be hard
Sometimes they do not make sense
Refrigerator (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
left 4 dead sorta contest thingGrow some balls, buy an Xbox, and play Halo: Reach like a real man. Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
Interpret the picture #192.68.0.3The prostitute got tired of my bull**** role playing and stormed out in my newly bought maids outfit. Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/05/2010 | |
Influential Music Lyrics.Ok, so post the most influential music lyrics you can find. Give band name and song, and why you find it influential. I’ll start: Song: Miserable at Best Artist: Mayday Parade “And this will be the first time in a week That I’ll talk to you And I can’t speak Been three whole days since I’ve had sleep ‘Cause I dream of his lips on your cheek And I got the point that I should leave you alone But we both know that I’m not that strong And I miss the lips that made me fly”
These lyrics spoke to me after I got out of a particularly one-sided relationship. I just love it, and it excatly how I feel every time I see that person. (view post) |
10/04/2010 | |
I n33d answersJoseph of Suburbia Posted:
Sweeeeeeeeeet! Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/03/2010 | |
ITT: Discuss exploits.Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/03/2010 | |
I n33d answersfembot_ Posted:
Log in to see images! No way! Dude, that would be sweet! Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/03/2010 | |
I n33d answersJoseph of Suburbia Posted:
Yes! My mentioned friend, Pandabrother, who was banned for reasons…which I am not sure of…told me about the whole Log in to see images! (view post) |
10/03/2010 |