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Infinite Sadness

Infinite Sadness is an attack that posts the tortured ramblings of regulars.

While this is not an exhaustive list, I did some research. This consisted of going to forums immune to Misanthropy and almost getting slaughtered. The random sayings range from the really depressing to the absurd.

Thankfully, none of these posts were made by real people . . .right?

The most positive news I’ve heard lately was when my boss told me that he thinks my career has peaked.

Dammit, why did I get strawberry? I always get chocolate. What the **** was I thinking? ****. I’m such a loser.

I shouldn’t have let the argument end that way. I should’ve slapped the @insult_female.

Don’t think about booze…don’t think about booze…don’t think about booze…

I spent most of today having breakdowns due to sheer exhaustion. Crying, sobbing, yelling…I’m just @expletive_modifier @broken. I can’t remember the last time I slept for more than a hour at a time. I’m truly at the end of my rope and I don’t have the slightest idea what to do now.

Just how many roads must I walk down before someone will finally call me a man?

Nobody will ever love me. I will be single forever.

This internet forum is all I have right now, and I’m pretty sure these people don’t even like me.

I post on the internet because my father didn’t love my mother because she was, honestly, a woman's genitals.

I am ashamed that every time I cross a black person on the street, I instinctively stick my hands in my pockets. Like that would stop them.

He doesn’t even know I exist!

I have a lot of friends, but I feel like I am always alone. Oftentimes I feel as if I am completely invisible and nobody ever thinks of me, even when I’m there.

If I could only play the banjo I’d earn my father’s respect

I’m so dissatisfied with my life. Why the hell did I decide to have that second kid? The first one was a ****ing big enough bumhole.

I am afraid of the size of my own black male reproductive organ.

My job is slowly suffocating me and I’m not sure I can do any better

My male reproductive organ is small and it doesn’t work very well.

If I were fatter I could troll the bear community and get the smelly, downy male reproductive organ I need to feel @beautiful and @sexy. But I’m just not quite fat enough.

Life is a prison, Oh God let me out. No one to listen, To hear when you shout.

I ****ING forgot to buy ****ing toothpaste when I was buying groceries. GOD JUST ****ING KILL ME NOW

If I had more money I could buy the love my parents never could afford to give me.

Poking holes in my boyfriend’s condoms, in retrospect, was not the best way to make him love me.

I should have never exposed myself to those schoolchildren. Seriously, what was I thinking with that one?

I can’t believe I spent so much time, money and effort building a @animal fursuit only to discover that my true animal-spirit is a dragon.

When she laughed at my romantic advances, I just wanted to crawl into a hole and suffocate in my own misery.

I’m sure, someday, when I’m much older, I won’t be sexually attracted to 11-year-olds anymore…right?

It’s like things would be okay if my band would just understand the difference between Latin-Blues fusion and Blues-Latin fusion. I mean, goddamn we’re so close to the big time and these douches RUIN EVERYTHING.

I shouldn’t have experimented with sucking my friend’s @male reproductive organ in college. I mean, yeah I was curious, but it pretty much tasted how I expected: delicious.

If my life were more interesting my one-man show would’ve sold more than three tickets and I wouldn’t have learned to rumba for NOTHING. **** THE WORLD.

I’ve lost my faith in Christ, and now I’m afraid to die.

I feel so ugly. That cesarean scar messed up my righteous kanji symbol tattoo.

Throughout my life, I always relied on my dragon heritage to get me through life’s difficulties. But then one day, I was confronted by my father. YOU’RE NOT A ****ING DRAGON! he yelled at me, ridiculing me for my life’s decisions and my proud heritage. He just didn’t understand…no one understands…until one day, the dragon overlord in my otherworldly thoughts revealed to me the truth. I wasn’t actually a dragon. I have never recovered…being relegated to the solemn, pathetic world of the humans.

Lesbian experiences aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. Now I just feel sticky and have a funny taste in my mouth.

Every once in a while my loneliness builds up to the point where I just want to end it all.

I got my hopes raised up so high, bought the ring, everything…but when I proposed, all she did was bark! I couldn’t tell if sniffing my bumhole was a yes or a no…OH THE PAIN OF UNREQUITED LOVE

I pray every day that the dragon overlord who took my heritage from me will snuff out this horrible existence and end my suffering.

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