I’m shocked nobody has started looking into Rectal Computers yet. I mean, this is a bum fellowship for hackers! What a better way to blend the two than to shove your computer up your bum. With a few trained bum squeezes you can access any web site or you can go old school with keyboard implants. If you’re really hardcore the computer can be embedded under your bum muscles (warning: you’ll end up with a ghetto twerker bum).

Remember: a cell phone has more power than the computers that got man to the moon. Imagine the sheer power that can lurk in your bum.