I wish for the abundance of ignorance, for ignorance creates stupidity, and stupidity is the basis of all comedy. Then the world would be a hilarious place full of stupid people. More so than usual.

I wish for some new colours. I am ****ing sick of green and purple. Seriously, what kind of a colour is purple? It’s a ****ing stupid colour is what it is. It’s like blue and red got caught in a car crash and fused together in the heat. So **** purple: Let’s get a new colour. We can call it “male reproductive organ” and watch all the fundamentalists feel awkward about using it.

Finally, I wish for an end to goddamn sonic sprite comics made by twelve-year-olds. It’s all I see when I go on smackjeeves.