You better like this, I kept this up for a bloody hour!

Connecting to server…

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: please disconnect

Stranger: right now

You: nah…

Stranger: do it

You: nah…

Stranger: you will before i do

Stranger: trust me

You: nah…

Stranger: i ever disconnect before somebody else

Stranger: *never

You: nah…

Stranger: you will see and you will loose

You: nah…

Stranger: ok

Stranger: before you leave

Stranger: LOOSER

You: nah…

You: play forumwarz or **** off

Stranger: you will loose

You: nah…

Stranger: or you can google this number 0060988649

You: so, have you ever player forumwarz?

You: it’s a great game

Stranger: you will loose

You: ****house actually

Stranger: disconnect please

You: because i’m bipolar actually

Stranger: sounds aweseome..ever thought about a disconnect here?

You: or mental

You: my doctor says its different

You: but my psychatrist says

You: taht i’ll be better in the asylum

You: and then

You: i’ll play forumwarz all day

You: and be happy

You: so

You: do either of you play forumwarz?

Stranger: talk to my hand

You: ok

You: hello hand

You: do you play forumwarz?

You: you shouldn’t

Stranger: haha you wiill lose so hard

You: its crappy

Stranger: no i dont

Stranger: but you play a game right now

Stranger: and you will loose Log in to see images!

You: nah…

You: but anywho

You: forumwarz

You: Forumwarz is a free parody role-playing game that takes place on the Internet.

You: but it’s ****

You: so don’t play it

You: Forumwarz is notable for its humorous and sometimes ribald writing and references to Internet memes.

You: is a parody of Internet culture designed by Crotch Zombie Productions

You: Unlike many traditional role-playing games (RPGs), Forumwarz takes place on a fake, parodic version of the Internet. The primary battleground is Internet forums, as opposed to the fantasy settings found in traditional RPGs. Parody themes include furries, script kiddies, Boing Boing, Apple Computer, ricers, 4chan, Ron Paul, Fark, gamers, Bill O’Reilly, Otaku, Cory Doctorow, and the Church of Scientology.

You: savvy?

You: anywho, mr hand

You: how do you feel right now?

You: hello

You: mr hand?

You: i’m so lonely….

Stranger: still here

You: what’s that

Stranger: wow

You: nah…

You: so anywho

You: forumwarz

You: its ****

Stranger: just disconnect and enjoy the relief

You: nah…

You: forumwarz

You: don’t play it

You: don’t even think of signing up

You: because its ****

You: Forumwarz takes place on a parodic version of the Internet, and the interface reflects this with an Instant Messaging client, online shopping for virtual items and services, and Internet forum battlegrounds. The Instant Messaging Client is called sTalk, a pun on “stalk”, and a parody of Google’s IM client gTalk.

You: savvy?

You: what’s that brain?

You: you say we should tie up and brutally enjoy the evil, evil man?

You: good idea

You: .....

You: so, forumwarz

You: got an account yet

You: better not have.

You: because

You: it’s a crappy game with all the money made going to starving kids in africa

You: and that’s ****

You: you don’t want that

You: madonna doesn’t want that

You: so don’t sign up

You: wow

You: you don’t give up easily

You: so…

You: umm…

You: Players are able to contribute to their own forums using forumbuildr v2.0 Beta, an in-game application named after Web 2.0 jargon. Each week, players vote on a topic to collectively build. Once a topic is chosen, players submit and vote on its components, including the content, logo and style sheet. At the end of the week, the forum is published and can be played by users.

You: Players also have the choice to interact in the multiplayer aspects of the game. This may be co-operatively, such as players joining together in klans[18], to work together in Domination raids, or just use is as a place to interact with others, aside from Flamebate (the standard forums).

You: savvy?

Stranger: disconnect

You: nah…

You: so forumwarz

You: do you [lay ot?

You: play it?

You: hope not

You: because if you do

You: you’re a ****ing loser

You: with no life

You: who likes jacking off to animals

You: savvy?

You: do you like forumwarz

You: it’ll help you get laid

Stranger: looser

You: but that must be a bad thing for you

You: you know…

You: having no male reproductive organ and all…

You: anywho…

You: One of the elements used in the creation of Forumwarz was the creation of a machine translation tool, called Unintelligencer. The tool translates standard written text into “unintelligent”, mimicking “a literate person’s text into something that wouldn’t look out of place on a YouTube comment”. The tool was one of the elements used by the Forumwarz creators to create unique personalities for the artificial denizens of its simulated forums.

You: see

You: the game talks like you!

You: so…

You: forumwarz

You: its good

You: i mean bad

You: i mean goat

You: whoops

You: sexy

You: do you find goats sexy?

You: mr. hand?

You: yoo hoo

You: mr. stranger

You: my doctor’s just given me my medication!

You: and i could type for hours

You: in fact, i will!

You: Welcome to Spoilerpedia, the official Forumwarz wiki.

You: All registered players are encouraged to edit this wiki when appropriate. We hope that eventually this will grow to be the definitive source for Forumwarz information. If you want to edit Spoilerpedia, please read our Contribute page first. If you do vandalize the front page or any other page, you will be banned.

You: Where do I start?

* Tips for Beating Tough Forums: If you’re having trouble progressing in the game this is a good place to start.

* Tips to go on with the Story: If your progress problem is not forum-related, here you’ll find tips to progress on the game story.

* Player Clbumes: Check out the individual (spoilery) pages for the Camwhore, Emo Kid, Troll, Hacker, and Permanoob for build strategies and skill lists. Or, perhaps you’re the masochistic type and decided to remain a Re Re and you need some help not sucking.

* If you’re an instant gratification seeker, be sure to check the Episode 1 Walkthrough and the Episode 2 Walkthrough!

* External Utilities: Here are some useful user-created tools to enhance your play experience!

You: Game Mechanics

* Interface: Take a brief tour of the main interface.

* Abilities: Learn all about abilities, what they do and how they work.

* Attributes: An explanation of the different attributes your character can have.

* Flezz: The currency of Forumwarz.

* Equipment: Items, both clbum-specific and general use, that improve your character’s attributes.

* .moar Files Special files picked up by pwning forums with a spider equipped.

o Related: List of .moar Files by Forum where they are available.

* The Toolbar: How the toolbar works during battle.

* Keyboard Shortcuts: Keyboard Shortcuts in Battle.

You: Multiplayer Games

* Forumbuildr: A collaborative tool to build forums with other users in Forumwarz.

o Related: a list of all Forums available for pwning.

* Itembuildr: Same as above but with items instead of forums.

* Forumwarz Domination: Compete against other users in our weekly meta game.

* INCIT: Build motivational posters and vote on them!

* Leaderboards: See how your character matches up to other players.

* Kyoubai!: The auction house of ForumWarz.

You: Community

* Flamebate: Flamebate is the official Forumwarz forums.

* Internet Delay Chat: The Forumwarz Chat Room!

* E-Peen™: Show off your E-Peen™ length.

o Related: a complete list of E-Peen™ in the game.

* The Stall: Other players can write on your Stall.

* Brownie Points: Purchasable with real world currency, Brownie points dramatically extend your play experience.

You: Episode Two

* For all the info about episode two, just visit the Episode 2 page.

Avoiding Getting Banned

* Check out what qualifies as a Bannable Offense.

Quick Help

* Knowledge base: Aside from this Wiki and whatever you might generally find in Flamebate we have a Knowledge base with all the most frequently asked questions (and many not-so-frequently asked ones).

Forumwarz Update Information

Want to stay in the loop on site updates? The best way is to check Flamebate and our Blog! The Blog pulls in Twitter and Facebook pulls in the Blog, but here are all the links you’ll need anyway:

* Flamebate

* The Forumwarz Official Blog

* Forumwarz on Twitter

* Forumwarz on Facebook

Stranger: intersting$

You: yeah

You: actually no

You: its ****

You: sign up

You: actually don’t

You: or maybe

You: i dunno

You: do you find madonna sexy?

You: or the idea of her getting kinky with those sexy, sexy, adopted kids?

You: because, i find that a major turn on

You: do you?

You: .....

You: anywho…

You: www.forumwarz.com

You: play it

You: so i’ll get paid

You: and if you don’t

You: **** you

You: then i’ll send evil african chrildren to your home to ransack everything decent

You: then,

You: i’ll get clint eastwood

You: and make hime tell you to get off his lawn

You: wow

You: you’re quite resilient

You: played forumwarz yet?

You: mr hand?

You: either of you

You: because where i am

You: it’s 3:30 pm

You: and i’ve got no job

You: so i could just continue all day

You: so…

You: forumwarz

You: what’s you’re verdict

You: oh look

You: 1974 users online

You: I was born in 1974

You: it was a good year

You: Queen were rocking out

You: oh look

You: 1979 now

You: that was another good year

You: the start of the 80’s rock evolution

You: with bands like nivarna starting to form

You: do you like nivarna?

You: nirvarna?

You: coz they’re good

You: well, used to be

You: coz kurt cobain’s dead

You: which sort of limits his capabilities to sing

You: dave grohl’s good though

You: foo fighters

You: they’re good

You: ...

You: oh look!

You: 1985 users online!

You: where were you in 1985?

You: 1985 (MCMLXXXV) was a common year starting on Tuesday (link displays 1985 Gregorian calendar). The year 1985 was declared International Youth Year by the United Nations.

You: International youth year

You: was that named after you

You: being born in that year?

You: or just a coincidence

You: do you like my talking

You: the doctor says its good

You: do you like it

You: because if you don’t ill kill myself

You: and that’s bad

You: .....

You: wow

You: it’s been a while since i mentioned forumwarz

You: so…

You: forumwarz

You: it’s good

You: play it

You: are you even listening to me

You: because the doctor says its good

Stranger: yes

Stranger: forumwarz

Stranger: disconnecting must feel like to play forumwarz

Stranger: you will loose Log in to see images!

You: nah…

You: so forumwarz

You: do you play?

Stranger: no

Stranger: disconnect

Stranger: thats what i play

You: why don’t you play forumwarz

You: it’s a great game

You: i mean ****

You: are you african by the way?

You: you sound like one

You: trying to steall all my money

You: you know

You: my doctor says you and me have a lot in common

You: wanna be friends?

You: mr?

You: anywho…

You: 1985 in Australia.

You: A very good topic.

You: Ingreat timesbents

* Queen of Australia – HM Queen Elizabeth II

* Governor General – Sir Ninian Stephen

* Prime Minister – Bob Hawke

* Premier of New South Wales – Neville Wran

* Premier of South Australia – John Bannon

* Premier of Queensland – Sir Joh Bjelke-Petersen

* Premier of Tasmania – Robin Gray

* Premier of Western Australia – Brian Burke

* Premier of Victoria – John Cain

* Chief Minister of the Australian Capital Territory – Post did not exist in 1985

* Chief Minister of the Northern Territory – Ian Tuxworth

You: do you know John Howard?

You: he took Australia out of a 98 billion dollar debt, inherited from the Labor party

You: lead by Paul Keating at the time

Stranger: yeah

You: and before that Bob Hawke

Stranger: soudns very interessting

You: it is

Stranger: disconnect?

You: Bob Hawke was the one who introduced medicare to Australia though

You: in case you didn’t know…

You: Medicare is Australia’s publicly-funded universal health care system, operated by the government authority Medicare Australia. Medicare is intended to provide affordable treatment by doctors and in public hospitals for all resident citizens and permanent residents except for those on Norfolk Island. Residents with a Medicare card can receive subsidised treatment from medical practitioners who have been issued a Medicare provider number, and fully subsidised treatment in public hospitals. Visitors from countries which have reciprocal arrangements with Australia have limited access to Medicare.

You: so yeah

You: after Hawke made that

You: he then told employer’s to go stuff themselves if they wanted workers to work the day after the Melbourne Cup.

You: know anything about the Melbourne Cup?

Stranger: no

Stranger: go on

You: of course

You: The Melbourne Cup is Australia’s major annual Thoroughbred horse race. Billed as The race that stops a nation, it is a race for three-year-olds and over, over a distance of 3,200 metres. It is the richest and most prestigious “two-mile” handicap in the world, and the second richest turf race in the world, after the Prix de l’Arc de Triomphe at Longchamp. The event is held at 3 pm on the first Tuesday in November by the Victoria Racing Club, on the Flemington Racecourse in Melbourne. This day is a public holiday for all working within metropolitan Melbourne, but not for country Victoria. For Federal Public Servants it is also observed as a holiday in the entire state of Victoria, and since 2007 also in the Australian Capital Territory[1]. No other horse race in the world has a public holiday dedicated to it.

You: of course

You: in recent years

You: Makybe Diva won it succesively 3 years in a row

You: did you know that?

You: Makybe Diva is an Australian racehorse, and the first Thoroughbred to win the prestigious Melbourne Cup three times: in 2003[2] and 2004,[3] and again in 2005[4] when she also won the Cox Plate.[1] Sired by Desert King to dam Tugela, Makybe Diva is the highest stakes-earner in Australasian horse-racing history, with winnings of AU$14,526,685 when she retired on 1 November 2005.

You: Season 2003-2004 (Melbourne Cup 1)

Makybe Diva resumed racing in the spring over 1,400 meters (4,593 ft), but while being reasonably competitive, she did not win any major races. Second up at her next start in the Group 3 Stock Stakes she came from behind to finish fourth, beaten by just over two lengths. She then started 5-1 equal favourite in the Group 2 Turnbull Stakes, where she again began in the back of the field, before finishing fourth, beaten by only one length.

After finishing as a 14-1 outsider in the Caulfield Cup, she began her partnership with Sydney jockey Glen Boss. Coming from near last with 800 meters (2,625 ft) to go in the 2,400 meters (7,874 ft) race, she finished fourth behind the Lee Freedman trained Mummify. The first Tuesday in November 2003 was her first Melbourne Cup victory.[1] Starting as an $8 second favourite, Makybe Diva raced at the back of the field until the finishing straight, where jockey Boss picked his way through the field to win by one and a half lengths.

In the autumn of 2004, she resumed over 1,400 meters (4,593 ft) with 59.5 kilograms (131 lb), followed by a third place finish in the Group 3 Carlyon Cup. Following this, she was blocked when making a winning run in the Australian Cup before being taken to Sydney, where she placed third in the Ranvet Stakes and The BMW Stakes, both Group 1 races. The Group 1 Sydney Cup over 3,200 meters (10,499 ft) was to be her final run for the campaign. Sent out as a $3.50 second favourite, she began off the pace, but charged home to record a win by half a length, becoming the first mare to ever win the Sydney Cup / Melbourne Cup double in the same season, and only the fourth horse to have accomplished the double win.

After the 2003-2004 season, trainer David Hall left to train in Hong Kong, and Makybe Diva was transferred to trainer Lee Freedman, generally regarded as one of Australia’s top trainers.

You: did you know that?

You: Season 2004-2005 (Melbourne Cup 2)

Her campaign in the spring of 2004, was aimed at winning the Melbourne Cup for a second time. It followed the pattern of her previous cup winning campaign, even though she appeared to be racing better than before. A close second in the Group 2 John F Feehan Stakes over 1,600 meters (5,249 ft) at Moonee Valley, showed her competitiveness in shorter races. In the 2004 Caulfield Cup Makybe Diva drew barrier 18 and settled at the back of the field. She charged home late to be narrowly defeated by arch rival Elvstroem who controlled the race from the outset leading all the way.

Makybe Diva was sent out a $3.60 favourite, and won the 2004 Melbourne Cup.[1][5][6] In driving rain, the mare defeated a field featuring multiple Irish St. Leger winner Vinnie Roe, Caulfield Cup winners Mummify and Elvstroem, Mamool from the Godolphin stable, as well as the 2002 Melbourne Cup winner Media Puzzle.

Resuming racing in February, Makybe Diva put in close finishes behind Elvstroem in both the C F Orr Stakes and St George Stakes, at Caulfield. On March 12, she won the Australian Cup, a weight for age event over 2,000 meters (6,562 ft), and in the process broke the Australian record and setting an unofficial world record for 2,000 meters (6,562 ft) on turf. She proceeded to win Sydney’s most important WFA race, The BMW Stakes, with a last-to-first burst. In April and May, she raced in Japan, where she failed in two starts, the latter of which was over 3,200 meters (10,499 ft) in the Group One Tenno Sho (Emperor’s Cup).

Makybe Diva was named Australian Champion Racehorse of the Year for the 2004/05 season. Along with this she was also named Australian Champion Stayer and Australian Champion Filly and Mare.

A three quarter brother to Makybe Diva, by Redoute’s Choice, was sold in April 2005 for an Australian record price of $2.5 million. Subsequently named Musket, the colt won his debut at Canterbury in August 2006.

You: mmm… Musket

You: sounds like something out of forumwarz

You: oh wait…

You: makybe diva

You: that’s it

You: so…

You: Season 2005-2006 (Melbourne Cup 3)

The neutrality of this article is disputed. Please see the discussion on the talk page. Please do not remove this message until the dispute is resolved. (December 2007)