Look, lady, this internet lifestyle only gives me access to a few stores. I could buy you a troll fetish. Would you like that? Hrm? Or Drugs. I’ve got some drugstores bookmarked. Sleeping pills could be right up your alley. (Ooops. Pun. I’m sorry. Lawl.)

Other than that, there’s just a dead parrot and a furry mask in the Ppwn shop. You obviously have an internet connection inside your box, so, give me a link to a toy store and I’ll buy you a god damned plush friend just to get you out of my life forever.

Creepy ****.