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Eglath

Avatar: Pink Dress
10

[The Flamers of Loa-
thing
]

Level 35 Camwhore

Gnefarious Gnymphomaniac

Welcome To Hell

A man dies and goes to hell. Satan greets him, shows him three doors, and says, “As punishment for your sins in life you must spend the rest of eternity in one of the three rooms behind these doors. Look in each one and decide which one you want.”

The man opens the first door and is hit by a blast wave of intense heat. Inside people are shoveling never ending piles of coal into the great furnaces of hell. The heat is excruciating and he can see that the people inside are covered in burns and charred flesh. Unable to stand the heat any longer the man firmly closes the door, confident that the other doors had to be better than that.

He opens the second door, and is immediately accosted by the tumultuous screams and wailing of the damed. He is almost afraid to look, but knowing that the rest of his eternity depended on it he looked inside. He saw endless rows of people strapped to various devices each with demonic attendants using countless tools of torture on their charges. Everywhere there was flesh being torn open, bones broken, and limbs being dismembered. But however much damage was done the wounds would heal so that they can once again be torn asunder. Sick to his stomach, the man slams the door shut and turns to face the third and final door.

Preparing himself for the worst, he opens the final door and peers inside. After the horrors of the previous rooms he can barely believe what he sees. Inside are people standing around, chatting, drinking coffee and eating pastries and just generally looking like a typical office party. The only glaring problem was that the room was roughly knee high full of ****.

“Hmmm,” says the man, “that looks bad, but it’s better than the other two. I’ll take the third door.” Satan smiles and shows him in, saying “You have made a fine choice, and I think this room will suit you well.” Satan introduces him to his fellow sinners and then leaves and the door disappears in a poof of burnt brimstone.

Ten minutes later Satan makes an announcement over the PA system, “Alright, this century’s coffee break is over, everyone back on your heads!”

(Author Unknown) Log in to see images!

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I do not have a solid citation for this one, there are many variants of the joke around the internet if you search for “back on your heads”. I have retold it here as I first heard it, but could not find this version for citation.

~Ektdeheba

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