The first enjoy was so spectacular, I had to purchase a second… and a third… But for these rapes I wanted something different. Not that Laguna in a silky FAIL suit was anything less than stellar, but this time, I would wear the FAIL suit, and Laguna would dress as me. I would be both giver and receiver of the enjoy, both myself and FAIL at once. I would encapsulate perfect lovmeaking in one, imperfect body.

I sent Laguna the instructions along with the payment: I would wear the FAIL suit and hang out under the bleachers at the local amusement park. Laguna, as me, would show up when I least expected it.

When the FAIL suit arrived, I could hardly believe how well it fit. The silky fabric clung to me like a second skin. I slid up the zipper and was amazed, once again, at how it seemed to disappear into the folds of the fabric. This Laguna operates a clbumy outfit.

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I looked at myself in the mirror, and seeing only FAIL, could hardly resist the urge to touch myself. “Wait,” I whispered, “enire, you must wait.”

I walked down to the amusement park, holding my head high, waving at pbumersby who thought I was the real FAIL. Men blushed; women swooned. Small children ran to hug me. Eventually, I reached the park.

The bleachers were just as I had remembered them: worn, dusty, carved and scribbled with the initials of lovers long gone.

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I found my way underneath…

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...picked a spot…

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...and waited…

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...and waited.

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****! Where the hell was Laguna? Hours had pbumed… clearly I’d been ripped off. I looked down at myself in the FAIL suit and wept. I tried touching myself, but the motivation was gone.

Forlorn, I trudged home. No longer wishing to face the throngs of FAIL’s admirers, I slunk through the back alleys.

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Suddenly, I heard a voice:

Hello, FAIL…

****. Another of FAIL’s admirers. Apparently, even hobos loved the guy. I wanted to rip off that damn suit and throw it in a dumpster, but I hadn’t even had the forethought to bring a change of clothes.

It’s quite dark in this alley, isn’t it…?

Oh my, look…you dropped a penny…maybe you should bend over and get it.

What the hell? I looked down.

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Well, I hadn’t dropped it, but I figured I might as well pick it up. Maybe my luck would change. It certainly couldn’t get any worse.

I bent over, and then the thought hit me, “How could he have seen that from over the—-”

I stood up partway, turned to look behind me. There he was:

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“Holy ****! It’s me! What the… OH, SHI—”

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OH GOD. OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD!!!

I came again and again and again. Then, as suddenly as he had appeared, Laguna was gone. Deeply sated, I limped home in the now-torn and bloodied FAIL suit, lit a cigarette, and sighed.

Thank-you Laguna. Once again, I am a satisfied customer.