Noturnal_Heartache Posted:

It’s not the same! My brother’s cat hunts every living thing in our yard. And I don’t have access to cool stabby tools. I have to steal my own razors. That’s why I carry so many at once…and why they’re only disposable.

Besides, if I had wanted to do anything I would have. I mean, I had a good 5 minutes or so before Monkey came in. Pleeenty of time to do stuff. But I didn’t do anything except mess up his plant-things. If you don’t believe me why don’t you just ask him yourself?

And how can it be sort of a spa? Isn’t that like being sort of pregnant?

It’s sort of a spa because it’s a place where they take care…never mind. You keep trying to change the subject, which is the fact that you’re a MAN-STEALING WHORE!

You barely waited until my back was turned! And after I poured my heart out to you! This is why it’s a rotten idea to have friends. They just STEAL YOUR MAN when they think you’re not looking. You can get your own cool guy!