dongs's Flamebate Posts

lets play a forum game

okay seeing as my name si dongs i get to go first

Mysterymeat Posted:

2. a bowl of ****logs fabulous person flakes with male reproductive organ milk

okay now what

Emos? Are YOu sXe?

bloOdy_tEars Posted:

”I love you,” said Bob the Tomato on the TV, hugging Larry the Grape around the waste. “Together I know we can do anything.”

“False pride!” Ruthie Cambot growled, purging the previous twenty seconds from the DVR. “Produce-on-produce adult situations!” She propped the remote between her pert teenage thighs, wondering if her seventeen younger siblings would ever truly appreciate the righteous sacrifices she made in editing their world for them. The remote rubbed between her legs as she stretched for the bowl of sugar free carob balls, and she realized her girl parts, they… itched. Itched like gonorrhea.

No wait, that wasn’t right. It more tingled, sorta like the very beginning of chicken pox. But she already HAD chicken pox. She couldn’t get it again… could she? Certainly not down THERE.

She caught her hand just as it was midway to scratching it. Her mother said to NEVER itch the chicken pox, so maybe she should use calamine lotion. No, her father had said that little girls who put liquid down there would go straight to hell without stopping at Taco Bell along the way. Maybe itching it just a BIT, just LIGHTLY on the OUTSIDE, wouldn’t be so bad.

Ruthie doubled over as the burning of a thousand tire yards shot across her girly-cess pool and straight up her file. “Oo!” She sighed, “oo-oo-oo!” She sounded just like Joe Ross, if you know who that is.

Just then Reginald walked into the room.

“Hey Ruthie,” he said, “I just heard something strange and decided to investigate.”

“Yes,” Ruthie said, letting her golden hair fall across her honey-colored shoulders. “I’m so glad you did. We’re not related, right?”

“That’s right.” Reginald said. “I’m the one your father took in because my parents smoked beer. I sleep in the basement. Under the sink.”

“That’s good,” she said in a throaty voice, “why not come over here and drink this grape Shasta.” And with a feminine sleight of her well-manicured fingers, Ruthie slipped a rufie into the fizzing tumbler. It was the one her father gave her. So she’d know what it would look like. So she’d never take one.

“MMmm,” he said, sipping the blue fluid down his hungry, fleshy throat, “thank you, Ruthie. I really appreciate your giving me this grape soda. And also letting me sleep under the sink.”

“Yeah.”

“I love you, Ruthie.”

“I love you, too, Michael.”

“I love everyone in this family.”

“OK.”

“Even the dog.”

“Mm.”

Michael didn’t realize where he was when he came to. The last thing he remembered was drinking grape soda with Ruthie, her well-pedicured toenails teasing the fabric of the couch when… no, he couldn’t think of her like that. She was practically his little sister.

“Oog,” he said, “where am I?”

“You’re here with me now.” Said a voice. “my darling Steven.” The voice belonged to Ruthie, who was supporting his greek godlike legs on the soft, warm confines of her lap. He looked up in confusion into the darkened confines of a vaulted ceiling, counted the myriad angels glaring down at him in contempt.

“Wait,” he said, struggling futilely against the drugs and the garbage bag twisty ties around his ankles. He’d been addicted to Drugs once, but those were Flinstones vitamins, which left him slightly giddy. This left his stomach feeling like a night with Fran Drescher. “Ruthie, how did we get into your father’s church? What are you doing with your hand? Why aren’t I wearing any pants?”

There was a throaty laugh as she brushed each well-manicured fingernail against his throbbing purple stovepipe.

“Oo!”

“Um.”

“Kink!”

“Do you like that, Joseph?”

“Yes,” Joseph leaned back and she straddled him, letting the fleshy crust of her Manwich slide against his cauliflower. It was leaking like an infected herpes sore. “but Ruthie, we’ve got to stop. You’re like my…”

“Be quiet, Manuel.” She said, pinning him down like a hot, sensual straightjacket. “You can resist if you like, but no one will hear you.”

“Eegh!”

“Oogh!”

“Squish!”

And then they had sex. It was pretty okay, but he bled a lot.

uggghhhh this is too long i think i saw some sex words

cant you just take a picture or something

My mother died...

i have no flez can i have like an arm or something

poetry contest

genericangstyposter Posted:

Cubear Posted:

male reproductive organ male reproductive organ male reproductive organ

put it in my mouth

the end!

Okay. I’ll put my male reproductive organ in your mouth. Quit begging me, woman's genitals.

—-

In a darkened room

Friend asked me to click Goatse

Distended bum

ahaha gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy

this forum needs to be pink

InsertCoins Posted:

Schildkrote Posted:

Sabre_Justice Posted:

lol goons

lol stfu

ceas ur postign

holy **** i agree with ****krote on something

why dont you just suck his male reproductive organ now that you agree on everything you fabulous person

Emos? Are YOu sXe?

also for some reason crystal meth doesnt count as a drug so thats fair game

poetry contest

Schildkrote Posted:

Lesprit Descalier Posted:

Log in to see images!rom the primeval mbum

Let precious chaos vent

Sacred flesh drenched in fornication

Beloved by Set

May the winds gather her together

From the secrets of men

After thousands of years of terrifying silence.

Phillistines, all of you who partake in the desecration of intellect.

you are a Log in to see images!aggot

please Log in to see images!or all our sakse

jesus chrits ur gay

itt we're all schildkrote

owls

AAAAAAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OWLS!

itt we're al evil trout

Phlegmatic Posted:

Evil Trout Posted:

dongs Posted:

Phlegmatic Posted:

dongs Posted:

Phlegmatic Posted:

hey dongs my grandma is telling you to stop posting

i am your grandma

(sorry it had to be like this)

this is like that scene from kotor where you find out you’re darth revan

omg nerdssssssssssssssssssssss

darth revan wasn’t bad, he was just misunderstood. i wrote fanfic about it, at least two people read it that weren’t my mom and said it was a good effort.

i liked the part where you use force convince to tell the thugs to jump into the bottomless pit

i liked the part where i forced you to suck my male reproductive organ Log in to see images! (view post)

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paging docevil haha fyad amirite