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Something_Wi-
tty

Avatar: 32289 2010-01-24 16:35:06 -0500

[Team Shortbus]

Level 26 Permanoob

OH GOD WHAT THE **** IS THAT MY HEAD JUST GOT DECAPITATED

Oh, idk if anybody cares or not, and frankly I don’t care if they care, but here’s my review of Chaos Legion, in narrative format:

“Oh hey, this seems like Devil May Cry. Kinda appropriate, given it’s by Capcom circa 2003. Heh. Alrighty, prologue was p easy, let’s get into the meat of this.”

“Oh, my ultimate legion broke thanks to Instant Plot Device. Well, that sucks. I imagine I can survive fine without it though”

“WTF WHY DO THESE GODDAMN TURRETS KEEP RESPAWNING AND PREVENTING ME FROM KILLING THE THING CONSTANTLY REMAKING THEM AAAAAAAAAAHHH”

“This boss…is exactly the same as the last stage’s boss…EXCEPT THERE ARE 6 OF THEM AND THEY HAVE BACK-UP WHAT THE **** IS THIS *proceeeds to die 20 times*”

“THIS GAME IS BROKEN AS **** AK;DHLWEHVRWELOGRWEKGRWEKRRJKWE”

“ARGH WHAT THE **** WHY DOES EVERYTHING KILL ME IN TWO HITS GODDAMN **** CRAP ****”

“oh god only my minions can hurt these invisible enemies…..and they kill my minions in one hit….and I have no MP to summon more…..*hurls controller*”

“finally. that one stage took my 3 goddamn hours. just gonna beat the boss then i can get some ****ing sleep at last. *2 hours later* EVERYTHING SUCKS I HATE THE WORLD FFFFFFFFFF”

“Final…..boss….at last….goddamn…..its first 2 forms….dead…..only….this one…to go….”

Boss: ”’sup. *LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS LAZERS MINIONS INSTANT-KILL EXPLOSIONS”

*3 hours later*

“Oh goodie. A 30-second ending. That was interesting. Now to NEVER PLAY THIS GODDAMN GAME AGAIN. I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A NEW DRINK COASTER FOR A WHILE. I NEED ANOTHER BEER.”

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