Dear Francis,

You are not alone. The decline in our advertising revenue from The CW4Kids television block over the past fiscal year suggests children are bored by our programming. In my 23 years with this company, I have developed an intuitive understanding of what kids like. Kids don’t like to be bored, and nothing bores them more than reading.

In our society, reading has become a substitute for parenting, telling children what they can and can’t do. Kids shouldn’t have to read a sign that tells them where the nearest bathroom is: they have the right to go to the bathroom wherever they want. No amount of meaningless words can convince them otherwise.

“Japanimation” lacks this problem. The written language of the Japanimese appears as nothing but graffiti to American children. Our programming is the only part of a child’s life that doesn’t force them to read, so we will naturally with hold their attention longer than teachers, social workers and our competitors. This promotes long term dedicated viewership, and long term commercial contracts.

We are making significant changes to our programming to better satisfy this criteria. Look forward to the exciting new changes this Fall.

-Al