Hey guys,

As part of my continual campaign against “fun,” this year I’m going to avoid putting any time, effort or cash into my obligatory Halloween costume.

Here’s where I need your help.

Simply give me your best suggestions for a simple yet “cool” Halloween costume that doesn’t require me to leave my apartment, spend money or do any gay arts and crafts **** and the best idea wins 45BP.

No idea is too crazy, so just let ‘er rip, even if it’s a mostly conceptual thing. If you describe it well and it’s convincing enough, I can work with it.

I’m not going to tell you what I already own, but you can make basic bumumptions. If I have to pick up a couple things from the local thrift store, I can do so, but I’m going for minimalist. However, it should still make people laugh, spark conversation and give me enough status that I’ll be bagging at least three scantily clad partygoers.

Including images, links to props I can consider getting or even printable handouts (years ago I went as a Swift Boat Veteran, complete with propaganda) — bonus.

Make as many suggestions as you want, preferably one per post. Don’t rip off any other posters’ ideas. No trolling. And I’ll stop taking submissions on Saturday October 31, 12 noon EST.

Good luck and happy Halloween!