Odalisque Posted:

I remember my first time on the internet. I fluffed up my feathers and stuck out my chest so I would look big and mean and tough so no internet tough guys would strong arm me, but left a lingering hint of vag to keep their interests. I was going to be respected as a person, not one of those girls on the internet that is seen as a girl, but one of the guys. But still terribly sexy. I wanted the girls to be intimidated by me because my guy-stuff knowledge was far superior. What other girl knows the konami code, can change her own oil and has taken boxing clbumes? I was going to be a ****ing legend, and all the internet would bow to me.

I made my first forum post. I opted to be notified by email when replies are posted. It didn’t take long for the emails to begin pouring in. Eagerly I opened the thread. I couldn’t wait to be queen of my own corner of the internet. What I saw has changed me forever.

“lol newfabulous person”

“mammary glands or GTFO”

“tldr”

“stfu noob”

What happened? I had thought this out so thoroughly! I’ve been on the quest to find the answers ever since. I keep trying my approach in new forums, but it never works. Can anyone tell me where I might have gone wrong??

lol JK JK that was all fictional

lol JK JK that was all fictional

lol JK JK that was all fictional

lol JK JK that was all fictional

lol JK JK that was all fictional

lol JK JK that was all fictional

lol JK JK that was all fictional

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