CrinkzPipe Posted:

Uhh, what happend to the “You get one submission per legal alt” rule?

It died in a fire or something. I should probably fix mine up D:

Connecting to server…

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Hello.

Stranger: HELLO!

You: HOLY ****

You: ARE YOU BILLY MAYS

Stranger: what?

Stranger: yeah man!

You: AWESOME

Stranger: totally billy mays

You: WE CAN HAVE

You: A YELLING CONTEST

You: RIGHT

Stranger: or at least a fan

Stranger: no

You: cool bro

You: oh

You: well that sucks

Stranger: i don’t like to yell really

You: oh

You: that sucks even more

Stranger: are you prince harry?

You: Nope

You: Nigerian princes aren’t named Harry

Stranger: t-pain??

You: Nope.

You: My name is Gregg Casey.

You: I am 35 years old.

Stranger: hi gregg casey

You: I am trapped in a jail cell with a computer, some knives, and a window.

You: I don’t know how I got here

You: But it’s Friday

Stranger: maybe you should try and make a break out the window

You: And tonight is Happy Night at my favorite pub, male reproductive organ’s Bar and Grill.

You: I’ve tried

You: The bars are made of Awesomium

Stranger: no luck huh

Stranger: I’m in Utah

You: I wish I could be in Utah

You: Log in to see images!

You: Anywhere but this pathetic place.

Stranger: i’m Morman

You: Wherever it is

You: Morman?

You: Morman Freeman?

You: DOCTOR Morman Freeman?

Stranger: no, just a morman

You: oh

You: :|

Stranger: a chocolate free morman

You: Are you peanut-bumer flavored?

Stranger: pistachio

You: Ew.

You: Pistachio is disgusting.

Stranger: no

Stranger: pistachios are SO GOOD

You: The nut, yes

You: The flavor, **** no.

Stranger: they were recalled did you her

Stranger: hear*

You: Really?

Stranger: apparently

You: well

You: Looks like I’m going to die

You: From too much awesome

Stranger: too much awesome what?

You: Well, if you eat or do anything with an awesome level that high, too much

You: You die from too much awesome

Stranger: i guess

You: An example is eating too many pistachio nuts.

You: You see, it’s sort of like Billy Mays and his commercials

Stranger: truth

Stranger: or maury

You: They’re so short because Billy Mays would die from too much awesome yelling.

You: So, ever heard of Forumwarz?

Stranger: no

You: It’s amazing

You: In fact

You: I’m going to log this chat when we’re done and post it on their forums.

You: Seriously

You: I get paid 8 bucks if it’s the funniest chat log

Stranger: that’s lame

You: 8 bucks is 8 bucks

You: Well, technically, I’m supposed to be trolling the **** out of you.

You: i.e.

You: fine upstanding member of society mammary glands ****TING male reproductive organS **** **** fine upstanding member of society fine upstanding member of society

You: etc.

You: But I’m horrible at that

You: Log in to see images!

Stranger: hmm yeah

Stranger: also… what’s the point

You: Of what?

Stranger: i suppose 8 bucks is the point

Stranger: but

Stranger: that’s so mean!

You: Well, you know what 4chan is, right?

You: Right now, Omegle says that there are 3592 people chatting

You: I can guarantee you half of those people came from 4chan, because they want to troll.

You: Simply because sometimes, it’s funny as hell.

Stranger: troll?

You: Think of someone who annoys you because it’s fun to them

You: that’s what a troll is

Stranger: oh

Stranger: weird

You: Or, on a larger scale, someone that initiates a fight or something of the like, simply because it’s funny to them.

Stranger: yeah

You: Yeah, that’s the Internet for you

Stranger: internetspeak

Stranger: laaaaammme

You: D:

Stranger: so do you troll

Stranger: regularaly

Stranger: regularly*

Stranger: ?

Stranger: are you a troll

You: Nah

You: I mean, the point of the contest IS to troll

You: But I’m horrible at it

You: It’s very fun when you get people to play along

Stranger: jamie oliver just had a baby and they named her petal blossom rainbow

Stranger: baaaaha

You: That sounds ****ing awesome

Your conversational partner has disconnected.