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It’s true: Obama is black. There’s nothing wrong with being black. I don’t hate black people, I just love being white ever so much!
Did you know white is the color of angels? White is the color of a beautiful snowfall on Christmas day. My beautiful wife’s veil was white on our wedding day, and our sheets were white that evening (until I took her sweet virginity away from her.)
Also white is the color of the delicious and sweet sugar I put in my coffee every morning. I then add milk to make it less black, because black is bitter and unpalatable.
White also rhymes with right. And might. And bright.
But enough about my superior pigmentation, here are my promises:
If I win:
– Every active account will receive a special new item.
– Since I am a capitalist, I will tax the poorest active accounts by 25% and spread it amongst the wealthy active accounts.
– I will randomly scatter 100BP over the accounts of those who voted for me.
If I also win the US Election:
– Evil Trout will record a karaoke version of the song of your choosing and will post it on Flamebate to mock endlessly.
If I also receive more friend requests than Obama:
– Custom titles changes will be free for a special pre-announced 30 minute timeframe.
|Posted On: 11/04/2008 9:21AM||View John McCain's Profile | #|