I think the most disturbing event of my life happened just yesterday.

I’ve been chatting with this girl over msn for a while now, and we met a couple weeks ago. (she’s ok-looking, sort of like Beth Ditto but not as fat and not as hot) Yesterday we had a date, and after seeing a movie went back to her place, we made out and before long I had my tongue buried in her vag and a finger in her bum.

This is where it all goes wrong.

I pulled my finger out and started licking her bum while gently pinching her clit, I then leaned back a bit while trying to find a comfier position, and was just going to slide a finger back into her bum when I notice something odd.

There’s something on my finger. Moving.

At this point I have no ****ing idea what’s going on, with a closer look I see there’s about 6 or 7 small white stringy things (each about 0.5” long) on my finger and more around her bum.

They’re all writhing and wriggling.

Horror.

I’m now holding my finger between us, pointing at it with my other hand, I can’t speak; she’s panting, out-of-breath, and looking at me as if to say “Why did you stop?”. When she realises what’s wrong she says “Oh…, they’re just threadworms, most people have them, they’re harmless.”

I ran.

4 hours later, I got back back home, I washed my hands with bleach and dettol, gargled a whole bottle of mouthwash, swallowed maybe 1/2 a tube of toothpaste.