FAIL Posted:

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Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

Would you like to come over to my place later? You can bring some friends because my face seats five.

They call me “coffee” I grind so fine.

I just **** into my pants. Can I get into yours?

Any of these working? I have more…

If my pillow had a hole in it, I would name it after you.

Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them.

Still nothing?

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO

Those are some of my favourite pick up lines!!!

“That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I’d be coming too.” Log in to see images!