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nanafabulous personiesus

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[ Team Shortbus]

Level 10 Re-Re

TeeKayEff Posted:

Minor grammatical error:

From Plum Computers store description:

Plum is famous for their Prune™ line of personal computers. Compared to a generic PC, Prunes are expensive, however they are generally built of higher-end components and have several hidden benefits, such as how “kewl” they look.

The comma after “expensive” and before “however” should be changed to a semicolon, and a comma should be added after the however. In its current state it’s rather run-onnish and awkward.

in your current state you’re rather run-onnish and awkward

...I KID!!

nanafagiesus edited this message on 05/19/2008 10:54PM
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