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JB Presents a Contest for 100 BP: Transgressive Nanofiction! | |||||||
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resubmitting because i think it got lost:
You can lead a horse to Water but you can’t make her drink it. |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 6:23PM | View Adapt's Profile | # | ||||||
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I like to wait at green lights to be sure no cars are running the red. As soon as they turn yellow, I go. |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 6:25PM | View MC Banhammer's Profile | # | ||||||
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Thr proper way to die is to enjoy as many grandmas |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 8:22PM | View Inspector Chelme...'s Profile | # | ||||||
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“No, momma not here no more; She wiff Jebus now,” Cheryl contorted in her wheelchair visibly upset.
I smiled, “Jesus loves both of you very much.” Cheryl’s snot-encrusted face beamed with a goofy grin. “I know because Jesus told me.” She laughed as I spoke, then quickly fell into doe-eyed awe as I so sincerely continued, “Jesus told me a lot of things about you Cheryl, because I pray to him every night.”
“Whats him say? What Jebus want me to do?” Too easy, I thought. I could feel the blood rushing to my male reproductive organ.
“Jesus wants to test you; he wants you to do some things I say so he knows you believe his words,” she nodded in anticipation, mouth agape. “If you pbum the test, you get to see Mommy in heaven… but if you fail… or you tell ANYONE EVER… well, he has to send you and your mommy down to Hell…” |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 9:57PM | View Celerysteve's Profile | # | ||||||
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how was I to know she was underaged? That **** said she was 13! |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 10:44PM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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It’s never too late… the soft spot is like an abortion bumon |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 10:44PM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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JalapeƱo Bootyhole made a contest. I read the rules. |
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Posted On: 07/28/2010 11:49PM | View Bacchus's Profile | # | ||||||
My first coloscopy has gone well. Like a surgery. An open-heart one. With rusty tools. Without anesthesia. SM dungeons are always so much fun. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 4:39AM | View Fridule's Profile | # | ||||||
Don’t leave me. For our daughter. I swear I won’t enjoy her again. Everyone can make mistakes. Can’t you forgive your own mother ? Fridule edited this message on 07/29/2010 9:42AM |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 4:51AM | View Fridule's Profile | # | ||||||
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“Look mummy, there’s an airplane up in the sky,” he said on his first, and last, vist to the WTC. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 5:09AM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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“I’ve always wanted to start a nursery,” thought Timothy McVeigh. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 5:12AM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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“I found a clown for the party,” Cindy related, “Make the check out to John W. Gacy.” |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 5:16AM | View puss mcquack's Profile | # | ||||||
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“May I have some more?” said dobnits. “Of course!” said his mother “Here’s some more poop for you to eat” |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 8:36AM | View SanDyk's Profile | # | ||||||
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Jane pried the clotheshanger out. The bloodied fetus hang at it from one its semi-formed nostrils. As she ate the delicious, dead abomination, she smiled hungrily.
Log in to see images! |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 1:23PM | View CAPTAIN-CAPSLOCK...'s Profile | # | ||||||
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I’m bored. ——————
He cut through her engorged belly to the child underneath. A cut to the child’s stomach reveals another child within. And so on for hours.
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Each nail was removed with a screwdriver, each tooth with a hammer. They were all put back by hand.
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The frog dissection was canceled. Instead, it was vivisection on frogs genetically altered to scream, even for hours after death.
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He cut off his male reproductive organ and crammed it inside her woman's genitals. He sewed it closed with needle and thread. “I’ll always be with you.”
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Bones cracked and broke, the body deformed. It was tight, but with one foot reaching her stomach he knew he’d crawl in and reach her heart.
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It was the first mbum murder in space. It was the first time man floated as cloud in a surrounding sky of blood.
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Dead animals couldn’t run away, she knew. The same must apply to dead lovers.
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Jones worked at the morgue. It’s where he learned to be an excellent kisser.
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He cried after he killed her. He had only meant to shoot the gestating child, but the bullet kept traveling up and up.
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Byron was a tit man. They used to belong to Jessica, Annie and Claire, but a sharp knife and expert stitching made them his now. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 2:17PM | View PhineasPoe's Profile | # | ||||||
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I’m voting Tea Party in the next election. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 3:11PM | View MC Banhammer's Profile | # | ||||||
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I think I’ll miss my legs… |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 5:10PM | View Listen2Reason's Profile | # | ||||||
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Great stuff so far, peeps. Gonna be tough to pick the winners here! |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 5:25PM | View Jalapeno Bootyho...'s Profile | # | ||||||
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I love you so much I want to cut off your head, stick my male reproductive organ down your throat and **** your heart. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 6:45PM | View Adapt's Profile | # | ||||||
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Sure, lighting his bunny on fire was cruel, but he put it out before it was dead EVERY time. |
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Posted On: 07/29/2010 7:16PM | View Bacchus's Profile | # | ||||||